Today was my first time visiting Angie’s twin babies, Esther and Emily, and while everyone was fawning over the both of them I was just…keeping my distance…I am terrified of infants. I think I am more terrified of the knowledge that they do not exactly own a stream of consciousness yet and also of how fragile they are and I cannot be trusted with fragile things. Especially living, breathing fragile things. And then I imagined them as toddlers five years from now, and it was fun to make deductions about comparisons between the twins, to predict which one between Esther and Emily would be the more outspoken one, which one would have a bigger appetite (for food and sleeping hours) but I stopped halfway because I knew if I was in either one of their shoes (or infant socks) I would’ve hated it. Don’t do that. Placing your expectations on people before they can even walk is very sucky -80/10 would not recommend
I came home and took a two hour nap during which I had dreams about the same people/person again and please can you stop and then I went downstairs to find out my dog had run outside and my dad and I had to chase after him but he kept on running and in the end we had to do it the reverse psychology way which is to just let him run wherever his little heart desires until he finds himself trapped and in this case trapped in an empty house two streets away.