mimpi ngeri

I had a nightmare this morning. It was probably a result of my stomachache and the anxiety that ensued.

I was in a biology lab (note that I say “a” and not “the” because it was nothing like the bio lab in Sunway, in fact, it looked scarily similar to the bio lab in Asma) taking bio practical exam for AS, which is ridiculous because I don’t even take biology for A Levels. The only other student I remember being in my dream was Zi Tian, who was on my left doing the exam as well. Before you ask, yes, I was aware that I wasn’t a bio student in my dream, but I still went on as usual anyway as if nothing was wrong, not even questioning why I was taking that exam when I wasn’t supposed to. Besides, Zi Tian was there and we’re classmates, so it didn’t exactly feel unnatural.

The exam started and we were all given a test tube filled with blue liquid which was apparently glucose and the test tube was placed in a huge conical flask filled with water and when I reached out to take the test tube out to begin the experiment, my hand slipped and I spilled the contents of the test tube into the conical flask filled with water. That was the moment I started to panic because that would mean that I had to re-do my experiment all over again with a brand new sample and I kept on glancing over at Zi Tian because she was already done with the experiment and was filling in her exam paper. So I told the invigilator, who happened to be Miss MC, about my predicament, and she said, “Are you sure? If you use a new sample it would be recorded in your exam paper and they might deduct marks for that” and I contemplated just bullshitting the entire paper with made-up data and observations but realised hopelessly that I couldn’t even begin to bullshit if I didn’t know exactly what was it I was measuring without the glucose sample. So I appealed anyway and the new glucose sample took forever to prepare as another teacher took out the raw ingredients to make the glucose sample and I was just ?!?!?!?!?!?!?! the entire time waiting for her to prepare my sample.

By the time my sample was ready, everyone in the lab had already left save for me and like, two other students and that was when I realise that my dad was also in the lab watching and waiting for me and I got even more anxious as I tried to concentrate on conducting the experiment again. As if that wasn’t bad enough, a different batch of students from a different intake entered the lab, and apparently their practical lesson had to go on despite the fact that there was still three of us left taking an exam. The entire time I was conducting the experiment I was just so nervous and sweating profusely, looking at my watch every few seconds and praying to God that I just finish the paper, please, as long as I finish the damn thing.

I woke up covered in sweat, heart palpitating, breath caught in my throat. Ngeri betul.

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Author: Michelle Teoh

23-year-old cynical Asian, book enthusiast and purveyor of fine sarcasm.

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