Category: Life’s Little Tidbits

I can’t understand. I can’t bear this.

I lost my class buttons…again.

Well, I didn’t lost the buttons, but I lost the button, but whatever, it’s more or less the same.

For non-Asmarians, the button above works as a pass for leaving the class. Hence, as the class monitor, I am in charge of ‘babysitting’ them.

And losing them.

It’s not my fault! Well, not entirely anyway. It’s just that I keep forgetting who’d take the button from me already, and my classmates just keep forgetting to unpin them from their uniforms, so, yeah, the blame goes to Forget.

I pray for my button to come home. Or else I swear I will capacitate it’s spouse.

You’re awfully small to be so hugely irritating.

Deareast Michelle,

We will be flying by malaysian airline to alor setar on the 15th June,2009. Estimated arrival time is 2.50pm. Tell mummy we can take taxi from airport to her shop in Tesco. Give me a chance to shop too !!! By the way where is Tesco ah? Is it far from your house?? 

Tell me what do you want me to get for you here in Singapore? Things that you may find it hard to get in Alor Setar. Anything. Do you have a lap-top? Do you need any IT related accessories eg. thumbdrive,handphone accessories…… There is a big IT fair coming up next week here.

Caitlin and Ian sure look forward to this June holidays.Uncle Richard will drive up by himself later and  then we all go back by car to Singapore, probably by 26th or 27th June.

Hope to hear from you soon dear.

 

Aunty Wendy

I stare at the coffee in my hands, breathe in its aroma that sends my head spinning in ecstasy.

When I’m happy, it tastes like a fresh spring day, relieving me of my burdens, taking with it all my sorrow and irritations as it slides into my stomach, out of sight.

When I’m blue, it tastes unnaturally bitter, as if taunting me of my mistakes, reliving all my regrets, replaying all my distress.

When I’m nervous, it has a stinging taste, as if stinging my taste buds to rev up my energy and boost my cinfidence for whatever I am facing. But sometimes, it just pushes me down into the sorrow pit even further.

When I’m angry, it burns my tongue and my throat, all the way down into my stomach. It has no mercy, and ignites my heart’s tinder, sending me into an even fiery state.

When I’m confused, it holds a peculiar taste that says everything, confunding me even more, like extremely minute wires squirming its way into my brain, sending compulsive surges into every part of my body.

When I’m hurt, it tastes bland, just like water running down my throat but weighs a lot more in my stomach. But sometimes, and only sometimes, my determination to stay upright causes it to cauterize the wound before there could be anymore bleeding.

My coffee has accompanied me through thick and thin, through highs and lows, and shared all my emotions. How about you?

Was I dying again, then? I didn’t like it—this wasn’t as good as the last time.

I think I have a female-paunch. I feel so full from all the junk I’ve just had.

Normally, I wouldn’t eat a lot. But I become gluttonous whenever I’m depressed or feeling low.

But I don’t know where -or how- the gloom came from. My exam is already over, so I should be happy, instead of pulling a long face.

So what is wrong with me?

My last night as Isabella Swan. Tomorrow night, I would be Bella Cullen. Though the whole marriage ordeal was a thorn in my side, I had to admit that I liked the sound of that.

Freedom!

Today is the last day of exam! Two tormenting days are finally over! No more staying up till the wee hours of the morning; no more anti-tv; no more anti-com, and most importantly, no more BOOKS!!! Yipee!!

Of course, the end of an exam is something worth rejoicing for, but there are also drawbacks. For instance, overloaded homework and having to attend classes which are exceptionally bo0o0o0o0o0o0ring. I’d prefer to be stuck in my own room, revising, than attend BM class. Yeah, it shows how much I hate school.

And then, it’s incredibly…wrong to let us have out test two weeks before the March holidays, cuz now I’ll have to wait for two more dragging weeks till the hols.

What a pessimist I am.

Attention is never a good thing, as any other accident-prone klutz would agree. No one wants a spotlight when they’re likely to fall on their face.

MY SATURDAY

I woke up early in the morning

Took a quick shower and grabbed

My violin and music sheets

Heading for my dad’s car in the driveway

When I noticed my dog just poo-ed on it

Oh…..

What a typical Saturday

And so I continued my way to class

And got reprimanded by my teacher

For not practising

Again

Oh……

What a typical Saturday

Coming back from class

I changed into my sports attire

And headed for school

For Sports Day

It was so incredibly hot

And I was so exhausted by the time I got back

Oh…….

What a typical Saturday

Changing into a fresh new tee

And a clean jeans shorts

I barely gulped down two mouthfuls of rice

And a horn was already blasting outside my house

Signaling tuition

Oh……

What a typical Saturday

Oh, Saturday

Do I love thee?

His voice was like honey and velvet.

Okay, the school would probably kill me if they found me writing this, but they had totally went over the top. Totally ABSURD.

Last Sunday, during assembly, Pn. Norlela showed us a Gaza War Powerpoint and video. I never knew she was an emotional person (well, she isn’t, I think, since she’s so garang all the time) until she cried. She REALLY cried. That was when she reached the “Manakah saudara-saudara kita? Manakah mereka apabila kita perlu pertolongan mereka?” And then her voice broke and she had to stop between words to speak coherently.

I was like, oh no, and felt quite sorry for her and the victims of the war -because it was a cruel and gruesome war, what with the beheading of the Palestinian children- but then it all evaporated into thin air together with her last sentence.

“Marilah kita boikot produk-produk Amerika Syarikat untuk mengakhiri peperangan ini!“

Aku ternganga.

Boycott America products???

And then the school started giving out flyers listing out the things or places that we are not supposed to use or go.

Eg.

Things: Milo, Nokia, Sony Ericsson, Dutch Lady, Dell…

Places: McDonald’s, Tesco, KFC, Pizza Hut…

You might as well ask me to strip my whole house bare.

Huh. I thought boycotting was, like, haram.

Stupid, shiny Volvo owner.

I’ve just viewed Jasmine’s blog and I can’t help admiring her writing. It really amazed me how fluent her sentences are, flawless, even. If only I could be like her. I feel so self-abased right now. T_T

Sometimes, I feel like I’m stuck in a dark cloud, with the absence of my silver lining. Watching everyone float past me, on dazzling white clouds, towards success, leaving me stranded on the dark cloud, licking my own wounds. Somehow, I know I will never succeed, never achieve what I’ve always dreamt of, what with Life’s unhelpful interfering and my indifference towards my surroundings.

I want to escape, to my very own paradise, my haven, where nothing will ever bug me again. I want to lie down on the beach, bathing in the sun rays, feel the waves beat against my body; drifting towards Dreamland. I want to lost myself in my own sweet thoughts, tasting the sweetness, cancelling out all the bitter memories…

But no. I can’t even escape to Australia yet, so forget about Dreamland.

Lucky Natalie. I wish I could go with her to Melbourne, be it sooner or later, as long as I am going, to escape from all the complications here. Another privilege I get to enjoy at Australia:  dropping BM. I find myself giving up on that subject already, hanging on a cobweb, dangling precariously, awaiting its inevitable fall.

Ciau, buds.

  It was bad enough that my best friend was a werewolf. Did he have to be a monster, too?

(—–> Photos might come later. Sorry. 😉 <—–)

On the first day of Chinese New Year, my si pek (fourth uncle) brought us to his farm at Pokok Sena.

We gathered at his house at 6. Then, we -my si pek, Soo May, Hoon Jie Jie, Sean Jie Jie, Kevin Ko Ko and his wife -Wati, my mum, my si em (fourth aunt), my ta ku (first aunt) and I- set off in two cars, si pek’s jeep and Kevin Ko Ko’s BMW.

The journey took up 20 minutes. We had to drive through a small kampung in order to reach si pek’s farm.

Si pek’s farm consists of dragonfruit, papaya, mango, cempedak and jackfruit trees. He began this orchard business last year. I think.

We only got beyond the dragonfruit and papaya trees, as twilight (ironic, huh?) was approaching.

That’s si pek in the white shirt, standing in front of his dragonfruit orchard.

Dragonfruit orchard.

Dragonfruit tree.

Hoon Jie Jie and a dragonfruit tree.

First stage of the dragonfruit.

Second stage.

Third stage: nearly riped.

After that, we proceeded to the papaya orchard, quite difficultly as the grass there was knee-length high and unkept.

“The Long and Winding Road” -David Archuleta. ^^

Papaya orchard.

A papaya tree.

The tree with the most papayas.

I was really surprised when I saw the papaya trees in si pek’s orchard. They were exploding with papayas! Si pek explained that an average papaya tree is supposed to be like that, its fruits are bore from the top till the bottom. That really sent me WOW-ing.

Besides, si pek also plans to plant his trees 100% organic. Kudos!

Si pek handing freshly plucked papayas.

Papaya plucked by si pek.

Owh, bitten by birds.

Me plucking a papaya! Yay!

After that, we headed to si pek’s mini house not far from the orchard.

Lovely house on the hill.

Exterior of the house.

Si pek plans to set up a homestay somewhere near his farm. I couldn’t help but agree that this would be a lucrative business as the surroundings there are calm and peaceful, far from urbanity.

All in all, it was a pretty great visit, and I gained a bountiful of experiences. I plan to come back to this haven someday, when I get the opportunity.

p/s. The papayas are sooooo sweet! Boo to pesticides and whatever chemicals injected into the fruits.

I want to be a monster too.

Monsters are not a joke, Bella.

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

Keong Hee Huat Zhai!

Xin Nian Kuai Le!

Happy New Year!

The phrases above are codes to acquire angpaus. They work. Trust me. xD

So I got a whole lot of angpaus today from relatives of both my mum and dad’s sides. That didn’t really sent me leaping into the air in joy as I would every year. I guess you don’t really notice such things once you reach puberty.

Speaking about puberty, this Chinese New Year made me notice a huge gap between the two generations of our society: the adults and the teens. (There weren’t many children as my relatives.)

Actually, it was my cousin, Kevin, that pointed it out during dinner that night. All the Teohs were gathered in my Grandpa’s house at Kuala Kedah that afternoon, and the scenario was…pretty obvious, to be truthful.  The adults were outside, playing mahjong and (snicker) checking their high blood pressure rate. Everyone was chatting away jovially, joking around genially.

Inside the house, it was a total antithesis of the outside situation. The inhabitants of the house were mostly teenagers, including me, and almost everyone had a laptop, computer or iPhone in front of them, fingers tapping away at the keyboard, not even exchanging glances. Including me.

Sometimes, it really aches to see such an enormous gap, yawning between the two generations, left abandoned, even though I, myself am not improving things by acting indifferent too.

Modernisms suck, sometimes.

I was stronger than Edward. I’d made him say ‘ow’.

Chinese New Year. What does it remind you of?

Hmm… Let’s tick off the list, shall we?

1. Angpaus (oh, yeah. Come to momma…)
2. Oranges (Bad one. Bad for my currently sore throat. )
3. Families (Oh yay. More angpaus.)
4. Homework (OMG, my study table is full of it.)
5. A sore throat and a runny nose.

WHAT??

Yeah, unlucky me. Getting myself sick just before the new year. Just perfect.

The cough turned up on Wednesday, a ‘hype’ in my school, apart from the Twilight craze. Yun Shuan has it, Peik Hwa has it etcetera etcetera. It was bad. Sometimes, in order to prevent myself from coughing out irritatingly, I had to claw my throat to ease the itchiness. Thank God I don’t have vampire nails.

And then the stupid flu had to take control over my system, torturing my already sensitive nasal cavity. Well, whaddya know, Yun Tong and Chew Jie had it too. The school was becoming more and more like a Sick Bank than a place for learning.

Oh goody. I hope they close the school due to an influenza or something. Then I wouldn’t have to face stupid ‘buku ilmiahs’ everyday, and, if luck was on my side, Carlisle would come and transform me into a bloodsucker and carry me to Forks or something.

Oh wtf. How did this Chinese New Year post end up with such a pathetic theory like that? Oh right. It was my luck. My damn unlucky luck.

Pee-ass: About the ‘influenza’ part, alright maybe I deserved a punishment for saying that. (slaps own cheeks 10 times. Superstitious crap…)

Btw, I wasn’t joking about the ‘Carlisle transforming me into a vampire’ part. I hope he would just hurry up with the Volturi (I’m still stuck in Breaking Dawn) and come to my rescue. Soon.

~Help needed for this mentally abnormal girl~

The sound of his name unleashed the thing that was clawing inside of me- a pain that knocked me breathless, astonished me with its force.

Before I make my announcement, I want to thank Zhi Xuen for giving me the heads up on this news. Thanks, Xuen!

BIG NEWS JUST IN!

Stephenie Meyer, author of the Twilight phenomenon, is writing a new book! The plot is the same as Twilight’s, but everything is from Edward Cullen’s POV. The book is called Midnight Sun and the date of publishment is still unknown.

Let’s keep our fingers crossed for an early release, okay?

For the first chapter of Midnight Sun, click here!

My mind shied away from the inevitable awareness that was coming,

coming quickly now.

Have you ever felt like your surroundings are turning into ashes, the world crumbling around your ears, and you’re the lone ranger, standing alone, fighting for nothing? Have you ever felt like you were the odd one out, despised, detested by everyone? Have you ever felt like there was a subconscious deep down inside you, clawing its way to get out and shine, but being pushed deep down again by the cruel reality world?

That’s what I’m feeling right now.

Sometimes, I feel like I’m holding on to a kind of numbness, not unlike Bella’s, a kind of numbness that keeps you working like a robot, following Reality’s (note the capitals) instructions. The feeling really is unlike a zombie’s. But then, when you get the time to relax, to think clearly, all of a sudden, everything starts zooming back into your mind, and the pressure and tension is too much that you feel yourself exploding inside out. Your heart beats rapidly against your ribcage, oozing too much blood, for deep down inside of you, there is a wound, a wound that cannot be healed, even by time.

Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does, even for me.

People say, Time heals anything. I find that theory incorrect in so many ways. Sometimes, Time makes things worse. It makes you face the inevitable, the truth about life, how life isn’t always as sweet as it seems, no matter how hard you try to improvise. Life is never fair, and neither can we be fair to it, too. It doesn’t give you what it wants, it gives you what you don’t, and make you face it, regardless of your reaction towards it.

If life is giving you a hard time, never give up, for it is a challenge that God is setting for you. Face it calmly and steadily, and God will help you, even through the rainest days.

~Aunty Peh Lan

What would I be without Aunty Peh Lan’s encouragement? Of course, face Life as it is, for it is a challenge. Do not bow to it, instead, outcome all the obstacles, give your best, and you will find that everything is working as smotthly as possible. Work hard, to achieve success. Do not be influenced by the Satan; shy yourself away from it, and turn towards goodness, justice, righteousness.

I am still waiting for my pinnacle of success. No, scratch that. I am working hard for my summit of success. I won’t let Life get the best of me. I will strive towards my goal, my ambition, despite all the hurdles that Life had set for me.

Life, you ain’t seen the best of me.

I was lost in an unthinking stupor,

holding with all my strength to the numbness

that kept me from realizing what I didn’t want to know.

I really should get used to my current situatian.

Bleary-eyed, tired, but still having a tonne of work on my back.

I slept late last night to finish my homework but had to get up early this morning to turn up for my school’s cross-country. I left school at 2 p.m. and had to hurry for tuition at 2.30 p.m. By the time I got home, it was already 4.30 p.m. I played my violin for a while then head for my violin class at 6. I got home by 7, and , after dinner, I had to go for BM tuition at 8 to 10. I didn’t realize I was exhausted until I almost dozed off in class. In the end, I had to admit, it was a pretty long -and tiring- day after all.

Ah, a typical teenager’s school life.

Haven’t written in a while, cuz things have been REALLY busy for me since my school reopened.

LIST OF DILEMMAS

1. None of my friends are in the same class as me.
2. I’m appointed stupid, crazy, demented MONITOR.
3. I’m kinda invisible in my class.
4. I’m sitting next to….MK?? (!!!!!)
5. My school principal just went over the top:

• First, she forces us to wear black shoes.
• Second, she extended our school time till 2.40 p.m.
• Third, she cut short our recess time till 10.40 a.m.
• Fourth, by MY PMR year, she wants out straight As percentage to be 85%.
• Fifth, she forces us to button our shirt collars till the very top. (Not that I’ll be following that stupid rule.)
• Sixth, she is such a PRIMADONNA.

6. I am totally addicted to Twilight.

7. I miss the holidays so much.

8. I might never see my BFF THAT frequently again cuz we’re in different tuitions this year. ='(

9. I still miss camp terribly.

10. I wanna faint at the sight of books. (Academic books, that is.)

11. Why can’t I be a vampire like Edward? I mean, a real one.

*Sigh* I may be too stuck in my own fantasy world to realize that the reality is trying to incapacitate me and eventually make me mad to death.