“This is a little late, but let me let off some steam…”

THIRTEEN. THIRTEEN, SIMON FULLER, THIRTEEN. REALLY? DID YOU REALLY JUST KICK ELEVEN PEOPLE OFF THE SHOW IN ONE NIGHT? I WONDER WHAT WAS GOING ON IN YOUR HEAD WHEN YOU INTRODUCED TO THE WHOLE OF AMERICA AND APPARENTLY THE WHOLE OF PLANET EARTH AS WELL THIS “NEW AMERICAN IDOL WAY” WITH THE ARRIVAL OF TWO NEW JUDGES. HONESTLY, HOW IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE FOR YOU TO KICK OFF HALF THE CONTESTANTS IN ONE NIGHT? WITH ONLY ONE PERFORMANCE NIGHT FOR THEM TO FLAUNT THEIR TALENT? THIS IS INJUSTICE. I N J U S T I C E. YOU MIGHT HAVE VERY WELL GOTTEN RID OF THIS YEAR’S AMERICAN IDOL WINNER. SUZANNE COLLINS WASN’T EVEN THAT MEAN I BET SHE DIDN’T KILL OF HALF OF HER TRIBUTES IN THE FIRST ROUND OF THE GAMES. WHAT THE HELL? THE ONLY TWO CONTESTANTS I REALLY LOVE -RACHEL AND BRETT- ARE OUT AND IT’S YOUR FAULT, FULLER. I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS RUNNING THROUGH YOUR MIND WHEN YOU THOUGHT OF THIS, BECAUSE I AM NEVER WATCHING ANOTHER EPISODE OF AMERICAN IDOL AGAIN.

STUPID SHOW.

Top Twenty-Four

Now playing: Chicago by Sufjan Stevens

This is a very, very late post about the previous episodes of American Idol and I apologise, but I just wanted to clear a few things here.

Firstly, you must really be wondering, what happened to Michelle’s obsession with American Idol? Why did she suddenly shut up about American Idol after strongly expressing her enthusiasm for the show in these three posts? Did she actually stop watching it altogether? Really? After those three posts?

It’s okay if you’re not wondering about that because I myself am wondering about that.

Yes, I still do watch American Idol every week, though I must say the main reasons why I didn’t constantly blog about it are, a) I lost interest in the show , b) I lost interest in the show because of the uninteresting judge panel, c) most of the time I get back from tuition and miss half of it anyway and can’t be arsed to write about it. I pretty much miss a lot during Hollywood week, and only started to really watch it “seriously” in the two-hour episode where the Top 24 are picked. Here is what I think about the Top 24 contestants:

Girls

Ashton Jones

Never heard of her until now, sad to say. I only know she’s from Nashville and I have this thing for singers from Nashville. (Most probably thanks to my obsession with Paramore.) I think she’s good. Just good, you know. Like, good-but-you-probably-won’t-stay long type of good.

 

 

Haley Reinhart

Never heard of her either. She has awesome hair though. Anyway…methinks she’ll be out soon as well.

Okay, that’s harsh, but some of these Top 24 people fail to leave an impactful impression. (I know right, I don’t know anything yet I still want to write a post about it, how shameless of me.)

 

Julie Zorrilla

Oh my God. Who on Earth is this, I honestly cannot remember her at all, I’m sorry.

But that is a really awesome surname.

 

 

Karen Rodriguez

I cannot remember who this is as well… God, Michelle, what were you doing when you were supposed to be watching the Top 24 episode?

 

 

 

Kendra Chantelle

AHA! This I remember! She sang Bluebird with another favourite of mine, Paul McDonald, also from Nashville. They make an incredible duo, but I am not a fan of her voice. I think people like Kendra are overrated in this show.

 

 

Lauren Alaina

I actually loved Lauren’s performance with Scotty and this other girl I don’t remember during Group week, when they sang Hello, Goodbye. She gave me an impression of a girl with a big voice. But then, holy Moses, she had to wear that horrendous pink (PINK!) barbie-esque dress that actually “floated in the air” together with pink (MORE PINK!) knee-high boots, and that’s not all because her outfit doesn’t just stop there no, she actually giggled throughout the whole sit-down with the judges and I’m sorry, but this turns me off really, really badly. I don’t like you, Lauren Alaina.

Lauren Turner

I know this name and I know this face but I cannot remember any of her performances hence this means she did not leave an impression so I will not attempt to exhaust my brain cells trying to recall who she really is.

 

 

Naima Adedapo

Naima I do know. Who can ever forget someone like her? (This is how you leave an impression, guys, appearance- and voice-wise.) I can’t say she is a favourite…yet, but she I definitely have an eye out for her.

 

 

Pia Toscano

I liked Pia immediately the first time I saw her. In a way, she reminds me of Paris Tassin (too bad Paris didn’t make it…what a sham), although mostly because of their appearances. They both have great voices, but in different ways. Pia’s is much stronger, and I think she has a chance at this.

Favourite #1.

Rachel Zevita

Definitely my favourite among the girls. She was an early favourite, remember, back in New Jersey? A petite girl with a huge and outstanding voice. I love her.

Favourite #2.

 

Tatynisa Wilson

I can’t recall who Tatynisa is. Sorry.

 

 

 

Thia Megia

Thia, Thia, Thia. Fifteen-year-old Thia. I don’t dislike you, and I think you are really talented for someone who is a year younger than me (low self-esteem right here), but I honestly don’t see what the judges see in you. In the judging room, if I were presented with you and Jessica Cunningham, I would’ve chosen Jessica. Honestly, I thought Jessica was going to make the cut. It must be a horrible, horrible feeling to try out seven times (this being the eighth) and still fail to make the cut. I don’t blame her for taking the piss on the judges, and on her birthday as well. I have nothing against young contestants, it’s great to have young contestants because everyone love young contestants but logically, young contestants never make it far. There’s a reason why they are called young. Now don’t start being mad at me, if I were to join American Idol, I wouldn’t expect myself to be chosen, because honestly, I know everyone else is older and more experienced than me, and why not wait a few years to gain aforementioned experiences before joining as someone more matured? Just my thoughts. Don’t diss me because I know Thia is a popular favourite.

Boys

Brett Loewenstern

I am honestly in love with Brett. (Already an early favourite as well.) I’m not just talking about his voice, because he is such a fantastic and kind and friendly person. I don’t care if you think he’s corny because I think he is sweet and you honestly cannot find many people like him in the world. When Colton Dixon, Jacee Badeaux and him went into the judging room together, his little question, “Can we hold hands?” just confirmed the fact that I will always be rooting for him. And when the judges finally announced the name of who would be in the Top 24, you would know, just by the look of his face, that fracture of a moment when his face turned from all smiles into one of complete astonishment; because he was ready to congratulate either one of his partners. In that short moment when all kinds of feelings rushed within me, I knew that Brett was one of a kind. He is just absolutely great, and he might not have the strongest voice among the rest, but he sure has the best personality.

Favourite #3.

Casey Abrams

I never really payed attention to him in the beginning, when they introduced him and all, because even my parents were saying how Simon would’ve frowned upon his nonchalance and goof-around ways, but when it came to his last performance with only his voice and his double bass, it totally blew me away. One of the strongest voice this season. Not really a favourite yet, but I’ll be keeping an eye on him.

 

Clint Jun Gamboa

Hmm…don’t remember him.

 

 

 

Jacob Lusk

I have deduced that Jacob Lusk is not a human being and functions on rainbows or some other kind of otherworldly substance because dang, this man has too much energy! I actually spent a good whole ten minutes cracking up when he jumped around the whole place after hearing he got into the Top 24. Not a bad voice, either, I’ll give him a favourite star for being the way he is.

Favourite #4.

James Durbin

Aha! I bet this guy is the one you’re all waiting for, huh? Well then, don’t kill me for saying this, but I honestly thought “meh” when I first watched his audition. As the weeks progress, people start comparing him to Adam Lambert and while I will not deny that I have done some comparison myself too, I don’t find him particularly outstanding or anything. I’m sorry, it’s just what I think okay? I don’t know yet. Maybe I’ll grow to like him, maybe I won’t, but it’s too early to tell yet, but for now, I am just putting him under the “meh” section.

Jovany Barreto

Eh. I can’t remember who you are.

(EDIT: Oh yeah you were the guy who took his shirt off…can’t remember anything else about you singing, though.)

 

 

Paul McDonald

I absolutely love Paul’s voice. It reminds me of the Gibbs brothers’ voices. You don’t find this kind of raspy voice anywhere, and unique voices are really what’s…”in”, you know, since most people’s voices are highly overrated nowadays.

Favourite #5.

 

Robbie Rosen

I remember this guy! Justin Long with Nick Santino’s nose! I will always remember him as that. Despite him being an early favourite…meh. I mean, I didn’t really pay attention to him, but I hear he is also a popular favourite (ahem Wahed) so I’ll be keeping an eye out for him as well, I guess.

 

Scotty McCreery

How can you not fall in love with Scotty’s baritone? How can you not? Because the first time I heard him sing…my mind was completely blown. I have no idea anyone could actually sing like that. And while many might not be a fan of his amazingly deep voice (eg. my mum) I am a loyal fan and I expect Scotty to get to great heights with his voice.

Favourite #6.

Stefano Langone

Am I the only one wondering what it is with mixed ethnicity and American Idol Season 10 this year? Because there are a great number of Latino, Puerto Rican, Filipino etc contestants this year.

I can only recall Stefano as one of the better contestants in the Top 24. And that my mum likes him.

 

Tim Halperin

Wow okay it’s finally the last 24th contestant and…WHOA HOLD UP. Who on Earth is Tim Halperin I have never seen you before on my TV.

…honest to God, I have never seen this guy before.

 

 

Early favourites that didn’t make the cut: Chris Medina, Colton Dixon

*Of course, you must know that people change hence opinions change so this is what I think right now but it might not be what I think a week or two weeks later, so don’t judge me too quickly. It’s just a TV show.

The Wild and Windy Night

Now playing: The Long and Winding Road by The Beatles

I’m not sure if I like this theme…yet. It’s relatively better than the rest of the other themes, but it kind of looks all over the place. But I needed a break from the Elegant Grunge theme because it was starting to grate on me for some reason.

I feel the need to post this picture because y’all will be seeing my face in the Stuff@School pullout in The Star this Monday, exclamation mark exclamation mark exclamation mark.

If you’re thinking, “Jeesh what even is this thingmabob Michelle constantly rambles and raves on about every second of her life on Facebook, Twitter, and now her blog”, here is the full explanation of what is going on.

A few weeks earlier, I was flipping through The Star newspaper and found the first, um, pre-issue of Stuff@School for the year. I’ve been collecting issues of S@s for a few years now, particularly because they have this “Write Stuff’ section where you can submit your own writing works, and I’ve always wanted to submit some stories of mine but always never manage to do it because I always, always exceed the 1,000-word limit. I’ve always loved the pullout though, because it’s the only kind of English pullout for schooling teens I can find anywhere. And also because there was one time I was featured in there for the Mighty Minds Challenge without myself knowing how it got there.

So anyway, I found the pre-issue, and the words on the front page really caught my attention: “Do you yelp for joy when you see Stuff@School? Is there a writer within you with lots to say and a riveting way of saying it? Are you chained to Facebook, Twitter and your blog?” And then I just yelped because number one, yes I was excited to see this new issue of S@s, and number two, yes I write a lot, I won’t say I have a riveting way of saying it, more like annoying, but yes yes yes I consider myself a writer, and number three, I breathe the Internet so naturally all three fields describe my life perfectly. And under those three questions is “If you just ticked all the boxes above, name and fame and attractive prizes, including a one-month internship at The Star, could be yours!” and I got curious, of course, so I read more into it and found out that Stuff@School is organising this young writer’s programme called Starstruck! and basically, at the first round, 40 participants from the whole of Malaysia will be shortlisted, and writing assignments will be doled out and once those works are done, they will be published in issues of Stuff@School. To sum it in a shell, it’ll be like writing for a newspaper, and seeing your face and name on newspaper print every week, which in itself is bonus enough for me. It’s pretty much the closest I can get to being ~famous~ anyway.

To apply, we were required to write a 500-word description of ourselves, which is actually a torturing task because to write 500 words, and only 500 words, is basically like writing a ringkasan/rumusan/summary because then there would be loads of crossing out, or in my case, backspacing. I actually only sat down and started to write two days before the deadline, because the whole time before that I was just pushing it to the back of my mind, telling myself, you’ll have time later, you’ll have time later, and by the time I realised it was two days to March 13, I finally got my arse on the chair and started to squeeze creativity juice out of my brain. As people who follow me on Twitter would know, I complained endlessly during that period of time when I just sat there procrastinating before finally getting down to business. I finally finished it in the course of two days, and was relieved I finally got it done.

To be honest, I didn’t get any hopes up at all. I’ve learned not to harbour high expectations in anything so I rarely thought about it. Of course I wanted to get shortlisted, but the thing is losing/winning with no expectations is better than losing/winning with high expectations. Hence, as aforementioned in my last post, I was ill and asleep when I realised it was the day the names would be announced, and so I got on my phone and…you already know what happened.

I just found a while ago that the upcoming Stuff@School issue will be printed in the national edition, which is to say, to those who subscribe/read The Star newspaper, watch out for the Stuff@School pullout section this Monday, because I’ll be in there! Here I’ll grace this post with some smileys which are really rare on my blog to express my excitement and ecstasy. 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀

Basically, I’ll be in every issue of S@s for the articles I will be contributing, so, I honestly don’t mean to sound conceited, but if you want to read what I write then you can subscribe to Stuff@School –but only through your schools because S@s subscriptions are through schools only. I know, it’s quite complicated, but it’s the way it is. BUT, subscribing through your school honestly isn’t rocket science, go here, find the telephone number for the Kedah representative, call him and inquire about the subscriptions, and voila! As for the people who go to the same school as me (well Asmarians in general), I’m the ambassador for S@s in Asma, ahem, and flyers will be put up in every class once I get the information on subscriptions, as well as the ELS board, where there will be a section dedicated to weekly snippets of S@s and whatnot. If anyone is interested in subscribing, and please do subscribe, don’t you want to read about what I write (loljk), give me your names and classes. As of what I know right now, you only need to pay RM22 for the full 24 issues. Cheap, right? So go subscribe now! Y’all can find me at 4 Negeri.

Okay, promoting business aside, you can also submit your own works to Stuff@School as well, anyone! All information on work submission can be found on S@s issues as well.

That’s about it for now, and I’ll be constantly updating on my journey with Starstruck! as I go. Also, comments on this new theme? New them > old theme / old theme > new theme?

Oh The Glory

Now playing -Casimir Pulaski Day by Sufjan Stevens

Oh the glory when he took our place
But he took my shoulders and he shook my face
And he takes and he takes and he takes

Today is too-much-excitement-for-my-poor-heart day.

As irony likes it, I didn’t start off with a good start today. In fact, it was a horrible start, waking up with a sore throat and a runny nose and the feeling of wanting to drown yourself in oblivion from the irritation and pain. I could barely get up but the thought of tomorrow’s tests grilled me up from my bed and I went downstairs, where I took in a few pieces of bread with hot Milo, still half-asleep. I downed a glass of apple cider and proceeded upstairs to another 2-hour nap, which was why I got worried when I woke up at 2.30 pm.

A quarter of my day, gone just like that.

My nose felt worse than ever, although the apple cider helped my throat a little. And that was when I realised what day it was today.

Monday. 21st of February.

See, I submitted an application to this young journalist programme organised by the Stuff@School pullout of The Star a week ago, and the results would be announced today.

I logged into Facebook on my phone and screamed when I saw this:

The first thing I did was run downstairs to flip through the day’s newspaper but there wasn’t a pullout and then I remembered that it is a subscription only for schools so I ran back upstairs to tell my mum and I must’ve been incoherent for a while because all I could do was open the computer and show her ^this and run downstairs to find the initial copy of S@S that brought this programme to my attention. I wasn’t particularly excited about the result day; I wasn’t expecting anything. No expectations is always better than any expectation. To think that I was the only one in Alor Setar to get shortlisted (SM Sains Sultan Mohamad Jiwa is in SP) and to be among the 40 students shortlisted in the whole country is kind of overwhelming, and so the adrenaline and breathlessness I felt tricked my body into thinking I was well and I was literally jumping all over the place, forgetting about my sinusitis and tonsillitis. It wasn’t until I finally calmed down and decided to study Physics that my nose started to block one side and let the other run, and ants were set loose in my throat again. So I went to see the doctor, and got prescribed huge-ass pills again. The excitement more or less started to wear off by the time I got home so I started to pick up my books to study again.

A while later, I got bored and started to scroll through my timeline and found this:

Which is great, because you know I’ve never gotten anything through snail mail for ages now (except for Galaxie subscriptions) and there is always, always something special about getting something through snail mail, and I suppose this is her response towards my sending her a birthday card. Thank you, Elya, you have made me feel excited and I finally have something to anticipate in the mailbox everyday now!

And if that isn’t enough, as soon as I opened my laptop I found out that Robin had already posted part VI.

I just screamed because I’ve been waiting for this for weeks and it’s time to get bedazzled by Robin’s amazing writing skills again and be incoherent for the next few hours or so.

Everything is just so magical today.

Photoblogging: How To Write Less Words and Make Your Post Look Awesome at the Same Time

Now playing- On We March by Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross (The Social Network OST)

What a horrible title to come up with at 11.16 pm. It’s like a cross between trying to be witty and trying to impress others, which, obviously, fails on both parts.

But oh well, here we go. Just choosing a few random shots I can find on Facebook or my folders and reminiscing. Excuse the photos’ quality because as you know I am not a paid or professional photographer and my phone will have to do most of the time.

(Top) Me & Pei Fong; (Bottom) Yu Han, Jia Yee & Yuen Ming

To be honest, this is the photo that made me want to write this post. We’re missing a few members here, but I think it’s quite clearly implied that this refers to all of 3 Asma.

I had the best school year ever in Form 3, and it’s really all because of this class and the members in it. Contrary to the popular belief that “Form 3 is hell” (which actually applies to all of us in the beginning but not so towards the end, and by the end I mean nearing PMR, admittedly) I actually had the time of my life studying with my favourite people, all in the same class. Remember that biscuit tupperware (which is always prepared full) we always had ready in case we got hungry? Remember trembling in our socks whenever it was Geography period? (That’s kind of a lie…it applies to early in the year as well.) Remember all the smiley faces we drew on each other books? (And that’s thanks to you, Pei Fong!) Remember the bengkel trips? Remember that word-linking game that I still kept in my test pad until this year? Remember feeling all giddy and excited whenever it was English because Teacher Zarina is awesome and there is always something to laugh about during her class?

Those were fabulous memories. 2010 was supposed to be a stress-inducing year for all of us but I can actually the opposite; I think we’ve had years 2010 and 2011 reversed.

All of you were great, and thanks for making 3 Asma such a wonderful class to study in and thank you all for being such great friends.

Ai Chen, Jia Wen, Jia Yuan, Xin Thing, Me & Jia Ying

These photo sequences are basically jumping everywhere, because this is the night when we welcomed 2010 with bangs and binges. Before midnight, we went to Tesco to get all this junk and even got Jia Yuan and myself matching T-shirts, which is great because now we have countless similar clothings in our wardrobes up to this day. Basically all we did was eat, because apart from the tidbits my mum even made herself busy in the kitchen and we watched TV, waiting for the countdown and later had the traditional “THREE! TWO! ONE! HAPPY NEW YEAR!” and there was a lot of back-slapping, congratulating, laughing, more eating, wine-drinking etc etc. That was also the day when Jia Yuan and I looked at each other and said dreadfully, “It’s the start of Form-neverending-tornadoes-and-windstorms-Three.”

An attempt to imitate Jack Sparrow…which ends in failure, obviously.

Wow okay I don’t look too flattering in this photo. But it stirs such a great memory it would be a shame not to post it.

Sa Pek and Aunt Susan dropped by from England and we went on a fishing boat, to, well, fish. You’d think that being the daughter of a son of a fisherman and having regular visits to Kuala Kedah almost every weekend would make me familiar with fishing boats and fishes and jetties, but this is actually the first time I’ve been on a real fishing boat. The first time we actually went to the middle of the sea during sunset and attempted to fish using the very old and traditional way that involves the usage of strings and a plastic bottle.

And guess how many fishes we caught? It’s not hard to guess since the digit begins with the letter ‘Z’.

(Top) Ji Lie, Ji Xun, Zi Kang, (oops), Angeline's brother; (Middle) Chin Jie, Chang Sheng, Me, Jia Yuan, Shiau Kang, Angeline, (Bottom) Jacob, (oops), Aaron, Joviel

I’M SORRY OKAY “OOPS” MEANS I’VE FORGOTTEN THE NAMES I AM SO SORRY BUT THIS WAS ABOUT TWO YEARS AGO AND I HAVE THE MEMORY OF A GOLDFISH.

This was the trip home from Seremban, and this photo was taken at one of the R&R stops. I went to NSCFL Camp that year and yes I did enjoy myself there that tears were actually shed on the last day. It was a really impactful camp not to mention awesome, what with the addition of all us awesome Alor Setar folks as well. Given the chance, I’d love to go to another year of NSCFL, but somehow finding time (even during the holidays) seems like a great chore nowadays.

Okay this is embarrassing, but the only people I know in here are Jia Yi, myself, and my teacher, the first three at the very top row.

I honestly cannot remember when this photo was taken. Um…2009, judging by the existence of my fringe? Sze Chan Music Centre organised this CNY-themed concert at Taman Budaya (wait was this during CNY I am confused and forgetful but let’s just pretend that it is) and no, this isn’t my violin teacher. She is a violin teacher in Sze Chan as well, but she recruited me into her “team” of violin members because there weren’t enough performers. I had a great time, really, because all the songs we performed were absolutely great (we had Oliver Twist & My Fair Lady songs how great is that) and I was happy with the performances. There isn’t much to add here, except that this teacher is also a BAMF because she took us to KFC once after a practice session. That is kind of cool for Alor Setar standards.

And so, to end this photoblogging post, I give you a very old and embarrassing photo of myself:

YOUNG MICHELLE AND YOUNG HIRO.

The moment I saw this tagged photo I snorted so loudly and forcefully a booger actually flew right out of my nose. Okay, I’ll go ahead and guess this was taken when I was 13.

HOW DID I MANAGE TO LOOK LIKE THAT WHEN I WAS 13?

I mean, look at that face. So cute and innocent, just like the puppy in her arms, Hiro.

Because both the girl and the dog look absolutely different now. I think we can agree that we have both become more vicious. Or more moody, whichever you like.

This has been such a fun journey, isn’t it? It’s good to laugh at embarrassing old photos.

I would also like to dedicate this post to Sasha, and I hope this makes you feel better. I love you.

If I Were Castiel On Valentine’s Day

It would be a terribly awkward moment to meet Cupid like this:

Meeting a naked and hairy cherub on Valentine’s Day doesn’t seem like great outing but then again if I were Castiel I wouldn’t have to worry.

Hello folks, it’s Valentine’s Day once again and I know, I know, I’m a day late aren’t I but too bad I stayed up late until 2am last night having a movie marathon, a very “single” thing to do, as you would know. I also had a Valentine’s dinner with my parents, and it was great, you know, because I get to wear a dress and put on fishnets and prance around in public instead of wearing pyjamas and staying at home all day long, which, is actually something I would prefer but after a long period starts to get really tedious. I actually sound like someone from a “Country Girl Goes Urban” episode, don’t I? I understand this sounds pretty hypocritical of me because one second I was griping, “Both of you go on and celebrate, I’m not even celebrating this awesome and great event because I only have a dog to celebrate it with but unfortunately he can’t eat chocolate because he will die if he does which is unfortunate because my idea for Valentine’s is a full-binge on chocolate oh well that sucks but what can you do?” and the next I was getting ready to go out because I am a girl and I am vain and also impulsive so.

See? This is how irritating I can get and why I’ll be forever alone.

You know what irks me the most on Valentine’s Day, other than sickening “♥”s and “xoxo”s all over the place? Those horrible, horrible songs by Taylor Swift and Bruno Mars that makes you want to cock a gun and just shoot them in the face from all the sickeningly “sweet” and ghastly words and phrases they call lyrics.

And I think about summer, all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the passenger side and
Realized I loved you in the fall

Your eyes whispered “have we met?”
Across the room your silhouette starts to make it’s way to me
The playful conversation starts
Counter all your quick remarks like passing notes in secrecy
And it was enchanting to meet you
All I can say is I was enchanted to meet you

When I see your face
There’s not a thing that I would change
Cause you’re amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile
The whole world stops and stares for a while
Cause girl you’re amazing
Just the way you are

But darlin’ I’ll still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my head on a blade for ya
I’d jump in front of a train for ya
You know I’d do anything for ya
I would go through all this pain,
Take a bullet straight through my brain,
Yes, I would die for you baby
But you won’t do the same.

Just throwing in these songs that the local radio station is oh so in love with they never stop to count the number of times they play it over the radio in a day.

Reading these lyrics, the first thing that comes to mind is “HOW IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE?” The only person who would catch a grenade for you is a patriotic soldier who is risking his life for the safety of a normal citizen, and thus protecting his country and his people. And the only circumstance under which Romeo would ask for your hand in marriage is when your life is actually made into a book under the classics section.

I’m sorry that’s kind of harsh but honestly if a guy would do what Bruno Mars said he’d probably be a sly conman who lives in the squatters and is eyeing that Tiffany’s necklace you had on.

The only occasion in which I would fall completely head over heels for a guy is if Andrew Garfield appeared on my doorstep singing “Michelle” by The Beatles in his sexy British accent.

Why do I keep torturing myself with fantasies like that?

I hope it’s not too late (oh wait it is, but whatever) to wish everyone a Happy Valentine’s Day and don’t forget to eat cake. Lots and lots of it.

PS. I got to participate in SCMUN! There goes my brain cells for the next few weeks.

PPS. Have I told you how in love I am with this fanfic? Because I am, and Robin is a goddess for writing something so superb, it is the only reason why I’m alive right now.

This Foreign Feeling

It’s 1:07am and I’m in bed, restless from worry, and an inexplicable sadness. School always makes me worry. All this confusion and complicated feelings, I haven’t had them for a while. Welcome back. There’s also the helpless feeling of feeling so alone, that there’s no one you can tell, absolutely no one. How is it that words, my blogs, all these inanimate objects are the only ones present when I need someone to turn to? And why is it that I’m writing in here for everyone else to see when it’s obvious no one really cares?

I’m sorry, I’m being irrelevant right now.

Free

Rereading the Egyptian Revolution of 2011 on Wiki once again reminded me of the time when I had to do research on the Rwandan genocide, although, of course, they are two completely different events. Last night, right after I finished my previous post, news that Hosni Mubarak, president of Egypt for about 30 years finally stepped down after the uprising increased in immensity, and the death toll (of protesters and officers alike) reaching over 300 deaths, spread throughout the mass medias all over the world, especially the Internet, which was also the place I found out about the news, from a tweet by BBC News shown above.

I still cannot get over the fact that for the past two weeks, while I led my too-tedious-even-for-a-documentary-film life, going to school, coming home, attending tuitions, complaining about homework, complaining about Add Math etc, in Egypt, everyone was roaming the streets and there were chaos everywhere and teenagers my age were probably taking part in the protests and demonstrations as well, their lives at potential risk, while in another frame scene, the president was sweating and worrying about the downfall of his regime. How is it that anyone else can continue with their daily routines in life, completely untouched by something as huge as an uprising? (Everytime I type the word ‘uprising’ I am immediately reminded of The Hunger Games, which is basically coming to life in Egypt.)

Out of all the photos circulating around the Internet for the past two weeks, this photo and its caption moved me and my tear glands as well:

Christians protecting Muslims during their prayers.

According to Wikipedia, this scenario occurred on the 6th of February, also dubbed the “Sunday of Martyrs”. Apart from the scene above, this also happened: “Egyptian Christians held mass in the morning in Tahrir Square to counter claims by state television that most of the anti-Mubarak protesters are members of the Muslim Brotherhood. Copts wanted to show that they are a part of Egypt’s popular uprising and share the same grievances as the rest of the country. Christians started their Sunday Mass in Cairo’s Tahrir Square as Muslim protesters formed a ring around them to protect them during the service. Crowds in Tahrir Square chanted “We are one, we are one” ahead of prayers held at noon for those killed during the protests. [source]”

I haven’t heard anything as beautiful as this for such a long time. Humanity still has hope. Other countries should really take this as an example from these admirable Egyptians. These people honestly give me hope. (Cheesiness aside, their courage and perseverance is truly wonderful and laudable.)

If you’ve been observant, you’ll notice there is this SocialVibe widget on the right sidebar and it would do me and a whole lot of other LGBTQ youths a great favour to click it. Once you do, you’re required to play a very simple and brief game, and that’s it! Your click will not be in vain as every click helps and supports The Trevor Project. Honestly, how hard can it be? Your help would be greatly appreciated, thank you.

…I’ll also write down an appreciation list for the people who helped. Just comment or in any other way possible tell me that you did and I’ll write long praises for you and tell you how much I love you. Just do it, people!

Just Be A Queen

Now playing- Born This Way by Lady Gaga

A different lover is not a sin
Believe capital H-I-M

I wouldn’t be what you call a “little monster”, and I don’t refer to Lady Gaga as my “Mama Monster” or freak out over Monster Balls, but I guess you can say I am a fan of Lady Gaga and her songs, just not to the extent of, well…feeling as pumped whenever I listen to Paramore, if that makes any sense.

However, that didn’t mean I wasn’t particularly excited when Gaga tweeted that her brand new single Born This Way will be released on Friday, which is today (Ahhh). So I gave it a listen, and many others all over the world gave it a listen, and thus this results in arguments and disagreements over what Born This Way’s lyrics really imply on Tumblr. It can be said this section of the lyrics led to the controversies:

Don’t be a drag, just be a queen
Whether you’re broke or evergreen
You’re black, white, beige, chola descent
You’re lebanese, you’re orient
Whether life’s disabilities
Left you outcast, bullied, or teased
Rejoice and love yourself today
‘Cause baby you were born this way
No matter gay, straight, or bi,
Lesbian, transgendered life
I’m on the right track baby
I was born to survive
No matter black, white or beige
Chola or orient made
I’m on the right track baby
I was born to be brave

Full lyrics

Many are accusing her of racism, cissexism, leading to a whole bunch of transgender disagreements. They are also accusing her of pandering and making money off the LGBT community and that this song is basically just a rip-off of Madonna’s/P!nk’s songs and a whole other things they managed to come up with in a 3-minute-song. Which is also basically just a bunch of dumb reasons to show that the dislike Gaga just because they do instead of the reasons they are spewing out to criticise her new single, which, in my opinion, is great and not just great but “IN YOUR FACE TRUTHFUL” great because out society is biased and narrow-minded in so many ways people need a warning bell to see through their biased judgments and prejudice. If Lady Gaga is making money off the LGBT community then why did she donate money from her Monster Ball Tour to LGBT homeless youths? And why did she repeal the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” concept? Or how about just plain having the guts to release a song that actually mentions the LGBT community, and not in a negative light at all? Listen to the song, and please tell me which part in the song did she express racism or cissexism, because I cannot find it at all and I’m pretty sure neither can a skilled Hufflepuff. And about Born This Way being a rip-off of Madonna’s Express Yourself and P!nk’s Raise Your Glasses, that is obviously a weak excuse to try and diss Lady Gaga. If you listen closely to every other song other than Gaga’s, there are similarities to other songs as well. And I quote someone from Tumblr, there’s so such thing as a truly original song. No matter what you think of, someone has already done it.

Basically, it’s just a song, so sit down and enjoy it. And if you don’t then don’t listen to it and if you hate it, by all means you have every right justified to hate it but don’t give unreasonable reasons why Born This Way is a horrible and immoral song, because Lady Gaga might not be the best role model in the music industry, but she is a role model nontheless to many others who have been inspired by her actions and songs.

Lady Gaga, never stop being you.

Buying It All Up In Outerspace

Now Playing- Black Sheep by Metric

Hello again, friend of a friend, I knew you when
Our common goal was waiting for the world to end

I’m sorry for being away for so long. It might not be too long for you but it certainly was for me. I’ve missed blogging about this year’s Chinese New Year because I’ve been busy before, during and after CNY, so I thought I’d just cram a summary about my CNY in this post, since this is basically an update-on-my-life post.

This year’s Chinese New Year was more uneventful and I guess you can say problematic because of all sorts of issues. But that didn’t mean I didn’t have a particularly great time, because I did, so you can say I did and didn’t have a great time this CNY. I’ll let you figure that out by yourself.

School is…well, let’s just say if I had only half a year to study for PMR, I could go to tuitions and take up all kinds of other lessons and I still wouldn’t be as busy as I am now. I’ve said this and I’ll say it again, whoever said Form 4 is a honeymoon year is clearly delusional. I’ve learned the effects Add Math can have on you and almost every day, I’d come home from school nearly incoherent and have aches everywhere, even, and especially, my head. Imagine! Sweating and aching in your joints not from any form of physical exercise, but from a math-athon.

Did I also mention how Jewnicorn love is taking over my life? Because they are, and no amount of well-thought out words and precisely formed phrases can ever describe my obsession with the perfect creatures they are.

On the other hand, Careful Confessions hit the 20,000 views mark! 20k views in a time span of two years, this makes me feel pretty accomplished somehow. And now, perhaps some kind of makeover to celebrate this milestone or something. (Which is honestly quite a pain in the arse because there aren’t any decent themes at the moment but I’m starting to get bored of this theme so I’m pretty much just hoping for a new theme release everytime I log in.)

The Eisenfield Fandom

LET ME PRESENT YOU THE TWO MOST FLAWLESS AND PERFECT HUMAN BEINGS ON THE WHOLE PLANET.

Click photo for sourceJesse Adam Eisenberg & Andrew Russell Garfield

This pairing is honestly the only pairing I am shipping so hard/makes me so happy these days. I don’t care what you say, it exists.

Click photo for source

“It’s very nice to be a part of something that’s been received this well, although it just kind of sets you up for a great disappointment later in life. It’s strange to meet people who are very recognizable in a way where they’ve also seen me in something. Every time you see somebody you’ve seen in a movie, it’s a little strange. You’re seeing them in a different context.” –Jesse Eisenberg

Click photo for source

“Acting came from me being depressed. I was a gymnast and swimmer until 13. Then I gave sports up and started naval gazing. I needed something to keep me afloat, so my parents suggested acting classes. I took them and a very encouraging teacher suggested I could make a career out of it. As soon as that happened, I felt some kind of purpose.” –Andrew Garfield

Click photo for source

“My therapist says that I should watch my films because you have to treat it with respect. The more people say nice things about me, the more I feel it’s false. Or the more I look for the things that are bad about me, and think those are the real ones. I could overhear somebody say something about me, and it destroys me for weeks. Yet I could win an award or hear nice reviews and it feels meaningless. I’m able to manipulate things into being bad, which is not a healthy way to live but that’s where I am now.” –Jesse Eisenberg

Click photo for source

“My connection with Jesse… I could talk about that for days and weeks and months and years.” –Andrew Garfield

Click photo for source

“My life is basically just feeding and cleaning cats… and then I get to be the sexiest geek alive. It’s a real blast.” –Jesse Eisenberg

Never have I seen such a great bromance without the ‘b’.

You know some of those times when the ultimate joy in life is seeing your favourite actors/singers/celebrities everywhere and your horrible mood brightens instantly? Exact same scenario here.

Thanks to you Jesse Eisenberg, I have never squealed so much watching yesterday’s episode of Saturday Night Live on livestream. Well, apart from this year’s Golden Globe Awards but that was also thanks to the Eisenfield action throughout the whole show. And thanks to Andrew Garfield, I am actually anticipating the release of a Spiderman movie and might actually like this Peter Parker for once.

How lucky is Emma Stone to bag both guys as her love interest in two movies?

Mixtapes

Hello these are my mixtapes and in case you don’t know what they are they’re compilations of some of my favourite songs, sorted according to my moods etc. To download them there is a mediafire link beneath each album and they are in the .zip format. To extract .zip files, a DIY tutorial can be found here.

My songs range from rock to indie to oldies to anything I fancy. Download if you like.

the rainbows-unicorns-balloons-daisies-happy-joy album

tracklist:

001. change of seasons sweet thing
002. bird of the summer a fine frenzy
003. into your arms the maine
004. pages there for tomorrow
005. punch-drunk love the summer set
006. eye of the tiger survivor
007. play crack the sky brand new
008. things i’ll never say avril lavigne
009. romance is boring los campesinos!
010. guns and horses ellie goulding
011. can’t let go landon pigg
012. mamma mia abba
013. what you know two door cinema club
014. summer nights grease cast
015. vcr the xx
016. slow down the academy is…
017. hold my hand new found glory
018. for the win we are the in crowd
019. your song elton john
020. get back to hogwarts a very potter musical
021. michelle the beatles

DOWNLOAD LINK HERE


the i’m-so-sad-so-very-very-sad album album

tracklist:

001. ghosts laura marling
002. howl florence + the machine
003. supernatural flyeaf
004. lost in love air supply
005. hallelujah lee dewyze
006. dylan emmy the great
007. i miss you blink-182
008. maria mat musto
009. anyone else but you michael cera & ellen page
010. across the universe the beatles
011. someone to fall back on i can’t go on, i’ll go on
012. remembering sunday all time low
013. o children nick cave & the seeds
014. make up smeared eyes automatic loveletter
015. the flight of apollo angels & airwaves
016. earth song michael jackson
017. like we used to a rocket to the moon
018. speechless lady gaga
019. dark blue jack’s mannequin
020. the cave mumford & sons
021. i just sighed. i just sighed, just so you know los campesinos!

DOWNLOAD LINK HERE


the i’m-pissed-and-i-just-want-to-be-with-my-music album

tracklist:

001. make me wanna die the pretty reckless
002. when i get home, you’re so dead mayday parade
003. keep your hands off my girl good charlotte
004. ghost bombay bicycle club
005. 1000 julys third eye blind
006. through the fire siobhan magnus
007. mischief with no direction this time next year
008. manic monday the bangles
009. to die for tonight alive
010. i write sins not tragedies panic! at the disco
011. smooth criminal michael jackson
012. unbreakable fireflight
013. rooftops (a liberation broadcast) lostprophets
014. my dear new years day
015. monster meg & dia
016. decoy paramore
017. i don’t want to miss a thing aerosmith
018. the curse of curves cute is what we aim for
019. can’t speak french girls aloud
020. samson regina spektor
021. safer to hate her you me at six

DOWNLOAD LINK HERE


the triangles-nebula-moustache-hipster album

tracklist:

001. never gonna give you up rick astley
002. my beautiful rescue this providence
003. meet you there busted
004. a certain romance arctic monkeys
005. the orchard ra ra riot
006. lovely bones kids in glass houses
007. thnks fr th mmrs fall out boy
008. lessons learned matt & kim
009. oh no! marina & the diamonds
010. stayin’ alive bee gees
011. bette davis eyes leighton meester
012. zombie the pretty reckless
013. there is a light that never goes out the smiths
014. black sheep metric
015. this party sucks the wonder years
016. punk rock princess something corporate
017. hummingbird heartbeat katy perry
018. giving up the gun vampire weekend
019. she’s a lady forever the sickest kids
020. book of stories the drums
021. never say never the fray

DOWNLOAD LINK HERE


the i-come-with-my-own-background-music album

tracklist:

001. sentimental x’s broken social scene
002. concerning the ufo sighting near highland, illinois sufjan stevens
003. i’ll run the cab
004. lua bright eyes
005. black hole she & him
006. crush jennifer paige
007. magnolia the hush sound
008. conspiracy paramore
009. my life is average deaf havana
010. so i thought flyleaf
011. in transit mark hoppus ft. pete wentz
012. weekend wars mgmt
013. you should be dancing bee gees
014. rabbit heart (raise it up) florence + the machine
015. grease is the word grease cast
016. you’ve made us conscious the audition
017. mythology versaemerge
018. kitten i’m smitten when i was 12
019. pretty woman roy orbison
020. almost lover a fine frenzy
021. defying gravity wicked cast

DOWNLOAD LINK HERE

Have some song/album/artiste recommendations? Comment away!


Hufflepuff Colours: Yellow/Brown

I look like such a dope, pardon me.

Today I woke up at the hours of a school day, because Uncle Lim was fetching Kai Li and I to Penang to get our braces done and her appointment was at 9 am. It was pretty bare in the waiting room when we reached the clinic, which is something I don’t see everyday. I waited for about an hour, then went in for no more than three minutes and I was done. That was by far the quickest appointment ever. After Kai Li was done, we had a pre-lunch at KFC and went shopping for a while at that shopping mall where there was the huge Popular sale the last time I went there (remember?) but we didn’t get anything because well, frankly there was nothing. When we reached Alor Setar, Uncle Lim dropped me off at Si Pek’s house and at around 4 we went to Tesco for a bit and then to Kuala Kedah, where Dad & Mum were fetching Ah Kong back to. Right after that we rushed home because I had Accounting tuition. I got back home and watched American Idol (btw I’m sorry but I cba writing an AI review every week now since it’s getting so bleurgh but I’ll mention some favourites from time to time) and the remaining parts of Small Soldiers and here I am, waiting for the Skins S5 first episode to finish buffering (so excited) while listening to A Fine Frenzy.

The Chinese New Year mood just isn’t existent right no, thanks to my school and the situation Ah Kong is in. On a more positive note, Xiao Ku & Joshua are coming back tomorrow and I’ll be getting my Mortal Instruments series.

Also, watch out for my next post. I’ve been saving it up the whole week for tomorrow. It’s going to be super-awesome.

PS. Thus, this colour combination means the end of my Hogwarts houses colour choices.

Hello, Goodbye

The people we passed by, the people we once knew, have you ever wondered where they are, what they are doing now? A close friend could now be a stranger you barely give a glance as you pass by each other on the street, too busy to notice the familiar face of someone you once loved. Likewise, an enemy could have very well be the one sitting next to you at school all the time. Have you ever laid in bed, browsing through folders and folders of rusty memories that you have come to cherish so well, and wonder, where is that boy who used to play tag with the girls all the time, who used to pick up food that had fallen onto the ground and eat it anyway? What about that classmate of yours who had crazy hair and made the funniest jokes in class? Are they still the same? Surely not. What are they doing now? How are they? You want to know, but you don’t know how. You have lost contact with them for months, and that’s not counting years yet. Then you realise, they’re gone. Just like a speck of dust landing on the tabletop, on the window sill, on your favourite novel, on your dog’s fur, they’re gone, gone with the wind, going where the wind brings them, and it is almost impossible to know where they are or how they are now.

Then there are those who have become people you barely recognise now. Photoshoots of them as teenage models, how could you have ever expected that? That innocent girl who was so shy and barely talked, now well-known as a model. Three years ago, would you have expected that boy who used to cry all the time in class to become a great badminton player? Or, looks-wise, would you have expected that buck tooth girl to transform into such a beautiful princess, the object of desire in her new environment? Everything is so unexpected. Changes happen too quickly.

Then there are the same old, same old. The best circle of friends with the best memories you would never ever give up on. The reminiscence, the road down the memory lane, the jokes and the teasing…all of them so wonderful and melancholic at the same time. I am still tricking myself into thinking, I’m still a part of my childhood. We aren’t any different from before, six, seven years ago. We aren’t any different from the Rugrats kids, or the kids from HeyArnold! But we will be, eventually, and this is the precipice where we stand, so fragile, the only discrete bond connecting us being determination and desperation. Two more years, this year and the next. Two more years, I’ll give myself that period of time to savour the moments I spend with those I call my friends. And then we’ll have to go our separate ways. I don’t know why, but all of a sudden that last scene from High School Musical 3 popped up in my mind, when everyone was graduating, going their own ways. There is a kind of bitterness of leaving the comfort of the norm of our lives to go out there, but we all have to do it eventually.

I cherish the memories I have and will build a fort out of it, thus when the dark days fall upon me I’ll know where to crawl to.

♫This is my Hello, Goodbye to all of you.