what’s so happy about a heartbreak party

lost spaces

in my pursuit of KL’s artsy fartsy art scene, i said “yes” in a heartbeat when taliza invited me to join her friends to catch lost spaces and talitha’s gigs at urbanscapes house. 

i’ve mentioned this before to multiple friends that since coming back to KL and being given a taster session on what is presumed to be KL’s creative art scene (zhongshan building, cooler lumpur, merdekarya and now urbanscapes), malaysians can be quite the artists, even in comparison to my experiences of artsy manchester (and we’re talking about manchester here, home of afflecks and oasis and the 1975, the actual hub of england’s artistic sub-culture). i love what they’ve done to the art scene here, by incorporating local elements and experiences to make it feel all the more familiar, all the more malaysian. it feels fascinating to me particularly because most of my life growing up in alor setar, i have rarely come to associate my surroundings with art. music, paintings, exhibitions etc that i learned about growing up were all sourced from the internet, and in my mind’s eyes were pretty much a foreign affair. it wasn’t until i went to sunway and met a group of creatively like-minded friends (studying a-levels, of all things), that i started to realise that there is an actually abundance of malaysian art, albeit more obscure than their western counterparts. (see “In convo w/ visual artist LITH NG on her show @ Urbanscapes 2018” written by my friend Ellen on her friend’s urbanscapes exhibition)

lost spaces is one such band that i discovered when i was looking up local artists on spotify. shun was the one who introduced them to me, the lead singer being a friend of a friend. and i was pleasantly surprised by how quickly i took a liking to their music, considering the fact that i have zero knowledge of the local music scene. they describe their music as “groovy indie pop with hints of ambient R&B” [1]. with heavy usage of dreamy synth sounds and malaysian-accented monologue inserts (as heard in instant.romance, where two boys discuss about the millennial woes of finding love), lost spaces makes music that is bound to make you dance or at the very least tap your foot along to, until you realise the inherent melancholy interlaced within the lyrics and you’re a bit confused because the song is upbeat but the words are so, so sad. (seems like we’re miles away from happy days / we seem to be stuck here looped in a fuzzy daze)

also they have really aesthetically pleasing single covers and i am weak for pastel colours of the pink to purple range.

Talitha’s gig was next and the Heartbreak Party was actually hers, in conjunction with her EP release of BOYS. her new EP is called BOYS, but the actual best track of it is called GIRLS. (if this isn’t a metaphor for real life, i don’t know what is). and it really is a heartbreak party, isn’t it? her songs sing of feelings of sadness, betrayal and disappointment in relationships that maybe hit a bit too close to home once or twice. it felt like maybe we were all supposed to cry together instead of sing along during the gig. (he doesn’t / he doesn’t want me enough to love / love me enough to try / he wouldn’t / no, no, he wouldn’t look me in the eye / even when i told him i’d try)

after the party, taliza and i headed for the balcony of the third floor of 2 Hang Kasturi for an impromptu shoot, something that i hadn’t done in nearly four years. and it felt really nice. there were other people around too, so there was no helping the initial awkwardness of people staring and a four-year hiatus (and an oily complexion after having just emerged from a crowded room), but it felt familiar, and it was taliza, and it was one of the few moments so far during which i felt the complete compatibility of my surroundings, and being in the city of KL. 

check out taliza’s instagram for the shoot:



[1] "Lost Spaces: An Indie-Pop Band Which Will Fill Up the Twilight On Your Daily Commute", Friends of Sevenpie, December 4, 2017 

Our Sunset Over the Castle on the Hill

We only decided to go to Ed Sheeran’s Manchester show a week before the show itself. Over dinner. We got our tickets from Twickets and on the 24th of May, after our IP law paper, Ee Min, Yee Lin, Ash, Jia Yang, CC and I headed for Etihad Stadium.

Getting to the stadium proved to be an issue in itself at first. Manchester Metrolink had special security measures for an event day as big as Ed Sheeran’s concert apparently, and it took us about an hour of waiting time just to get on a tram, and we eventually only did so by forcefully squeezing our way into the absolutely jam-packed carriages. It was a highly uncomfortable 20-minute ride and you could see everyone audibly gasp for air the moment the tram doors opened upon arrival at Etihad.

Ed’s entrance onto the stage was…to be honest, quite befitting of his super humble character. No fanfare or anything fancy like that. He appeared, got on stage, and immediately started singing. A man who gets straight to the point.

Just gonna outright admit that the songs of his that I was most familiar with were entirely from his + album from eons ago, a distant phase of my life. It reminded me of driving in my car after freshly acquiring my license for the first time at 17, and gushing about his music with Irfan back in college. It felt quite surreal, like a clashing of worlds.

But I’m glad I got to make new memories to associate with his newer songs, in his actual literal presence at that.

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

i’m just protecting my soul

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

ワンオク イン マンチェスター

Confession: I only started listening to One Ok Rock a month prior, but when I found out Joe would be coming here all the way from Newcastle just to watch them live, I thought I might as well join her after managing to find some spare tickets on Twitter.

On Tuesday morning, Joe left for the SU as early as 8 in the morning to start queuing, but no one else came to form a proper queue until after lunch, and we joined the queue as numbers 5 and 6. Of all the Mancunian days to be outside in the freezing cold for a long period of time, it had to be the day that the temperature was well under 0 degree Celsius for the whole day. Honestly, Joe for MVP of the day for braving through almost six hours of the cold with the help of multiple Costa hot beverages and layers of winter clothes for our spot in the queue.

I had a lecture until 5PM so I rejoined the queue after that, taking turns with Joe to go home and change and grab a bite. Iasmina and Aya joined us shortly after that, and at 7PM sharp, we were released from the clutches of the savage cold and into the excitement that was watching One Ok Rock live with our own eyes!!!

I’ve been to lots of concerts and gigs, especially in the UK, so I think my statement is pretty legitimate when I say that OOR’s stage presence is the best I’ve ever seen. Right from the moment they appeared on stage, the energy never subsided (okay, except for ballads but even then, the hypnotic grip their performances had on us never faltered for one bit) and every single song was a solid ten out of ten. Vocals, guitar, bass, drums; it really was a performance which you can feel the members putting their 100% and more in, and so naturally, you can’t help but give in 100% too.

Also, special shoutout to Taka’s voice for being so ridiculously out of this mortal world. His live rendition of Take What You Want gave me literal goosebumps and at one point, I felt like his vocal performance was too sacred a moment to not be indulged in fully in that present moment that I stopped recording (which is saying quite a lot considering the endless dots of my Instagram stories) and just. Listened. And drank in that instant of being there, in the presence of good music, connected to the band on stage and also to everyone around me belting out lyrics that mean so much to everyone in the room.

I was told that OOR sold out stadiums in Japan and other Asian countries within seconds, so to be able to attend a rather intimate gig of theirs in the front rows of the 900-people capacity hall of Manchester Academy 2 all the way here in the UK sure made me feel like God was being generous in gifting me with luck that night.

The night ended way too soon and we were reluctant, so after the gig, we waited next to their tour bus in hopes of managing to catch a glimpse of them one last time before they leave Manchester for good. Tomoya somehow managed to pass by us unnoticed, and at some point, Taka appeared, during which I was too shocked and seized up to do anything except say “Hi” nervously when we made eye contact for a split second, and then he was gone.

My night ended the way most of my nights this year did: a super late dinner/supper at McDonald’s, and a good couple hours of reliving the concert back in my room with Joe before falling into a deeply satisfactory slumber.

Joe made a vlog:

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

just looking out on the day of another dream

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

God Bless My Lorde and Saviour

I was actually in Croatia when tickets for Lorde’s European tour went up, and so my ticket purchasing moment saw me riding in the shotgun of our rented car, driving along the breathtakingly picturesque Croatian highway en route to Dubrovnik from Split, partially Google-maps-navigating, and partially buying tickets on Ticketmaster as quickly as possible before they were sold out.

Thus, with a click of the “Buy” button, Chong En and I were going to watch Lorde live in O2 Apollo on the 26th of September.

Pure Heroine was one of the albums consistently present in my 2014 college playlists, a particularly musically magnificent period of time for me, during which I weaved many tales through music together with my friends on road trips or chilling sessions, whilst Melodrama is such an aesthetically fulfilling album filled with both dance-worthy tunes and soul-crushing ballads. There wasn’t a single moment during her show where Ella did not give her hundred percent, and seeing her quirky but passionate dance moves contagiously hyped the hall’s atmosphere up throughout the entire night. Vocals, concepts, costumes, performance – and even merch; all of them were tens out of tens. It was an incredible night.

Despite being on the cusp of her twenties, Ella’s talents shine so brightly in the way she manages to encapsulate feelings and emotions that deeply resonate with those little dusty corners of our hearts that house loneliness and melancholic affection through her lyrics and music, making her songs anthems of the young and misunderstood.

Despite it being a rather solemn period of time for both artists and concertgoers following the recent attack, the spirit of appreciating live music with other similarly musically-inclined people lived on, something that I hold very dearly in my heart.

Khalid was the opening act

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:



Throwback to 7 years ago, when I first heard of them because a Tumblr friend of mine posted a photo of the xx vinyl that she’d bought.

Throwback to 3 years ago, when their music was what I sought after when I was in the mood for some masochistic sprinkling of salt over my emotional wounds.

Throwback to 4 hours ago, when I saw The xx live for the first time before my own eyes. It was a night of great music and completely losing myself to dancing (scope that reference) in a crowd of musically like-minded strangers.

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:


Two years ago, in the middle of June, Fly FM had a radio contest where listeners who managed to call in and give the right answers to Bastille’s lyrics read on air would win tickets to watch Bastille live in Australia. I remember vividly, sitting in front of the laptop with 20 AZlyrics tabs pulled out, listening intently to the cue to call, and then frantically calling the station with my fingers crossed that they would pick me, please pick me, oh god please. However, predictably, they never did, but I did learn a lot from that experience, such as realising how difficult it is to actually get through the line to a radio station and learning how to google lyrics at the speed of light, as well as building a rapport with the DJ in charge by spam tweeting them out of frustration to the point that when I actually called through (but not during the cue to call), he knew who I was and there was nothing for me to do except scream internally from watching the last shred of my dignity break into pieces.

Two years later found me at the exact same position in the living room of my house, laptop in front of me again, but this time I was clicking into the news that was announcing Bastille’s UK tour for their new album, and despite there being no standing tickets left, I went ahead and bought a seating one anyway. Two-years-ago-Michelle would be proud.

It turned out that getting seat tickets was a good idea because the show was at Manchester Arena, and I didn’t particularly feel like wrestling through the crowd at the pit of a venue so big. I had luck with me when I bought tickets, honestly, because my view was actually perfect, directly facing the stage. Probably the only downside of being in seats was everyone else around me being too chill that me shouting and dancing in my seat made me feel a little out of place. But eh, that’s more of my own problem than anything else isn’t it

Rationale was one of the opening acts - they were pretty good
Rationale was one of the opening acts – they were pretty good

This was during Oblivion – there were no flashes and bright lights, only Dan’s voice ringing through the arena and amazingly, a sea of white light among the crowds as everyone held up their phone torches. It was really beautiful.

If you want to know what it feels like to experience something trippy, attend a Bastille concert. I particularly loved a concept they did where the onstage screen split into multiple small screens and played real life newscasts from all over the world in various languages, followed by more splitting into smaller screens showing scenes of retro TV shows (they incorporated a lot of TV dialogues -that they’d inserted into songs in their Other People’s Heartaches series- into their new album so this worked out very well for them) cut so jumpily that I don’t really know how to describe it besides – trippy. Couple that with the strobe lights that flashed in sync with the beats of the songs and you get an otherworldly experience of being somewhere you’re not. Unfortunately, the strobe lights gave me a bit of a headache for a while that I had to shield my eyes while singing and jumping so that was quite funny. But during Pompeii, despite the lights and everything I gave in and went all out, a good encore to round the show up with.

And oh boy, Dan’s voice was absolutely magnificent, so powerful as it echoed throughout the arena. Bastille really knows how to put on a wonderful show.

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

花樣年華 #EPILOGUEinBKK (and other stories in Bangkok)

It all started five months ago, in my tiny room in Weston during the first week of Easter Break. I was horribly sick and cooped up in my room for days on end when Sakina started sending me links to BTS’ Youtube videos and, confined in my room by my illness, I had nothing at all to do except dive deeper into what I would soon realise to be a K-pop hell in which I now inhabit.

And then in June, Bangtan announced Epilogue tour dates for South East Asia and one of them was in Bangkok, Thailand. Against all odds, and indeed there were many, Sakina got us tickets to watch Bangtan live in Bangkok for real.

It didn’t really feel real then and the feeling persisted even on the day I was to fly to Bangkok.

5th August, Friday

My parents fetched me to Penang on Friday morning where I met up with Sin Ming before flying to KLIA2 together. There, we met up with Zhi Ting who would be flying with us to Bangkok as well. By the time we reached Bangkok, it was 6PM but we only actually left Don Mueang Airport two hours later due to the ridiculously long queue at passport control. We took the bus to Chatuchak Park MRT station, being able to only make uncertain guesses as to when we’d reached our intended destination due to the lack of English interpretations on signboards. There, we queued 30 minutes to get our MRT tickets from a ticket machine, realised the machine only accepted coins which we didn’t have, and then joined another 30-minute-long queue at the ticket counter. So you can more or less hazard a guess as to how ready I was for the day to end by the time we got out of the Thailand Cultural Centre station and found out it was pouring. The last meal I had was six hours ago so I gave in and bought some snacks from a roadside stall, waited for the rain to subside a little before setting off on foot to find where Sin Ming and Zhi Ting’s airbnb were. I was staying with Sakina for two nights, but because no one was around at her airbnb, I followed Sin Ming in the meantime while waiting for Sakina and her friends to get back.

Searching Sin Ming’s airbnb itself took more than an hour, the location of the apartment being so elusive and secluded. We got lost as well, and had to resort to asking the people in a 7-Eleven for directions after Sin Ming’s Thai sim credit ran out and couldn’t be used to contact the airbnb host. At that moment, Sakina texted me saying they were back at their airbnb, so I told Sin Ming and Zhi Ting to text me once they’d reached their airbnb before calling an Uber.

Imagine my utmost relief when I found out my Uber driver was a woman. It was late, and I was alone and tired but I was granted the chance to feel a hint of safety by this minor detail. After giving her the address I got from the airbnb website, I laid back and allowed myself to relax, tracking our journey on Google maps as a precaution. And it was fortunate that I did that, because half an hour later, I realised we were entirely off track from the location Sakina had just sent me and I started to panic. I asked the driver to stop by the side before showing her the address Sakina had sent in Thai, only to be told that it was in the complete opposite direction from where we had been heading towards for the past 30 minutes. I apologised profusely as she took a U-turn while I felt dread slowly consume me because 1) this was going to be be a very expensive car ride and 2) the day felt like it could never end from the physical and mental exhaustion and hunger and uncertainty of having a place to stay at for the night.

About 15 minutes later, the car pulled into the driveway in front of a building, and it seemed like my driver didn’t know exactly where the building of the airbnb address was. Despite that, we must have been within the vicinity of the address and searching by foot would be easier so I told the driver that it was okay, I could get off here. She stared at me ridiculously and said, “No, no” and got out of the car to ask the guards stationed outside the building we were in front of for the precise location of the address. At this point I was overwhelmed by everything, mood-sensitive to every single thing that was happening around me because I’d been travelling the whole day and was tired and hungry and alone in a foreign country, which explained the surging feeling of gratitude that swelled in my chest after that, because my driver, who was practically a stranger and just doing a job she was obliged to do, didn’t have to go to such lengths to make sure I got to my destination but still did anyway. It turned out the airbnb was across the street so she made a U-turn and I informed her that Sakina was coming to get me at the entrance and as I was getting out of the car, she asked me “Really??” repeatedly and didn’t drive away until Sakina appeared.

It just astounds me that someone I don’t know, a literal stranger, would help me so nicely without asking anything in return. It made the night so much better after the turmoil I’d been through for the past few hours.

And Sakina!!!! The moment I saw her I just went in straight for a hug, whispering “Oh my God, oh my God” ceaselessly because 1) I’d finally reached where I needed to be in one piece and that meant that the day was coming to an end 2) the last time I saw Sakina was three years ago in Bristol and we’d been talking about this day, Bangtan Day in Bangkok, for weeks and seeing her in the flesh made the notion realer by the second 3) the addition of factors 1) and 2) made me quite literally sag in relief as I allowed myself to let my guard down for the first time that day.

6th August, Saturday

The exhaustion hadn’t quite left my bones the next morning but it was Bangtan Day, and remembering so was capable of erasing all traces of weariness (even if temporarily) as the whole house (and by that I mean four of us – Sakina, Aizzah, Amal and I) woke up that morning in various states of frenzy. What to wear. What to bring. How to deal with actually seeing Bangtan in real life. We knew we were going to be spending literally the whole day at the stadium so that meant bringing along essentials to stay alive such as water, food, fully charged powerbanks and makeup. And then finally, we were off to the stadium.

We took two trains and along the way, we already knew to notice other people around us who were also going to the concert. It didn’t start out that obvious, just teenage girls moving in groups and you could just as easily reason that they were going to the mall or something (except it was eight in the morning) until we started seeing people wearing shirts with Bangtan names on the back and yup, we were definitely heading in the right direction.

It was 9AM when we reached Huamark Stadium and already there were SO MANY PEOPLE. People loitering around in shaded areas, lining up in queues as fansites distributed freebies, taking photos with the giant poster that had seven of their faces on it, and –the queue we were looking for– queuing in front of the merch booth waiting for it to open at 11AM. There were already around 100+ people in front of us as we sat down to mark our place in line. Amal and I went around getting some fansite freebies for a while –I got some photocards– before most of them ran out and we returned to the queue.



Okay so here’s the thing: none of my previous concert experiences ever has really prepared me for this one.  I think the longest I’d had to queue for a concert was probably Paramore in KL in 2010 for four hours, but I remember that being in a relatively shaded area. And then recent gigs in UK saw me queuing at most two hours in the cold, which, to be honest, was relatively tamer compared to queuing in the South East Asian heat for the same amount of time. Aizzah had a heatstroke halfway through and had to be brought inside into an air-conditioned room while Sakina and I queued for ticket and hitouch registration after we got merch. By the time we had everything that needed to be sorted out done with, it was 2PM and all we could do was — wait. Those two hours of suspense and anticipation until 4PM in the relentless heat felt like the longest hours in history but the situation was slightly alleviated when I scrolled through Twitter and found out Pokemon Go had just been released in SEA on that day itself so the first Pokemons I caught at Huamark were Weedle and Gastly.

(Much later on after the concert, I found out [to my amusement] through photos people posted on Twitter that there were people standing right next to the stage who were catching Pokemon right in the standing pit itself.)


And then at 4PM the doors were opened. Sakina and I headed for Section O of seating while Aizzah and Amal (and Sin Ming too) had standing tickets. I still couldn’t actually believe this was real even as I walked into the stadium that was gradually being filled up. On the stage there was a giant banner on stage with the words “HYYH ON STAGE: EPILOGUE” and Bangtan’s MVs were playing on the screens on both sides of the stage and still I thought, it couldn’t be. This couldn’t be real. I didn’t realise I was yelling (and some degree of whimpering) “OHHHHHHH MY GOD OH MYYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDD” while Sakina just kept saying “DON’T EVEN START” because we were INSIDE and this can’t be REAL we’re actually GONNA SEE BANGTAN

It was an hour until the show actually started and the entire time we were singing (see: screaming) along aggressively to the MVs as if it was the actual concert itself but I would soon discover that that was hardly “aggressive” compared to What Would Come Later.



At 5PM the stage went dark and everyone screamed, and by everyone I mean I definitely screamed for about 10 minutes straight. Was I even screaming coherent words? Who knows. All I knew was I still refused to believe they were actually there, right in the flesh in front of me until the sheer cloth separating us shrieking folk from the actual Seven Gods fell away and Run started playing.


The whole time I was just thinking, all my karaoke sessions alone in my room in Weston have really paid off because I didn’t even know the exact Hangul lyrics but that wasn’t stopping me from belting them out in Romaji, entirely off-pitch but also entirely shamelessly. I told Sakina this after the show, that usually when I go to gigs, it still takes a while for me to “”””””let loose”””””” but probably because Sakina was a great concert companion or probably because I really, really, REALLY LOVE BANGTAN OR PROBABLY BOTH I found myself not caring about the tendrils of self-consciousness that crept in each time I scream-sang and danced ridiculously in my seat and it felt absolutely, out-of-worldly amazing. I mean, I was still wary about standing up when everyone else wasn’t so I wasn’t that revolutionarily brave, but I loved the concept of screaming and dancing and not pausing to think what other people would think if they saw me in my current state and purely not giving a shit. It was incredible.

But you know what’s even more incredible? Do I even need to say it because of course Bangtan. To this day I’m still so HHHHHHHHHH each time I think about it that I don’t even know how to put it into words but I’ll attempt to for the sake of this blogpost

We weren’t allowed to record anything during the show and security was pretty strict and I didn’t want to risk anything so I didn’t. Here is where I draw another comparison with previous gigs I’d attended: I always, always try to record at least a few songs at gigs for the sake of posterity but it comes at the cost of perpetually watching the entire concert through a phone screen. Not having the self-imposed obligation to put my phone up to record (and make sure everything was within frame the whole time) felt really liberating, and I could immerse myself completely in my surroundings. Like actually focus 500% of my attention on the people on stage and what they were doing and saying, what they were wearing, how their facial expressions looked like and even how the crowd was. Of course, this also came at the price of not being able to rewatch the concert after it ended but I guess there’s also Youtube for that despite it not being as firsthand an experience as it otherwise would have been. But honestly? That was a small price to pay in exchange for the experience I had.

AND OF COURSE JUNGKOOK DID SO MUCH AT THIS SHOW!!!!!!!! Each time I see him I just? scream but I wasn’t even screaming anything that’s the thing while everytime Yoongi opened his mouth Sakina beside me would literally stand up and scream so you can honestly gauge our situation for the whole two hours of the show. I even made a thread of a comprehensive list of my favourite things that happened at #EPILOGUEinBKK:

One thing definitely worth mentioning is the Thai ARMY fan project during Fire and Young Forever. When we took our seats in the stadium, there was a bag on each of our seats and in it were two light-up rings and a piece of paper with instructions on it, telling us when to switch on which ring light. When Bangtan performed Fire, the crowd lit up in vibrant, multicoloured stars, contrasted with the usual white dotted lights of ARMY bombs.

Credit: BillboardThai

During Young Forever, the stadium lit up in a sea of bright blue light instead, with white lights in the upper rows showing the zodiac signs of each member.

Credit: @nxnoey

I mean. This was my first ever K-pop concert. The first time I actually even liked a K-pop group happened mere five months ago. And here I was feeling so overwhelmed by the events that had transpired. I was Truly Blessed™.

I Need U was the last song and before they started singing, they held their mics out for the crowd to sing the entire first verse and chorus and it was then I was hit by a giant slab of Emotions because 1) the screens were showing each of their individual expressions as they listened to the crowd sing, and I couldn’t help but feel??? I don’t even know how to say this but can you imagine standing in front of thousands of people while they sing perfectly in Korean to your song??? and then there was also 2) the show was ending. It was already ending when it didn’t even feel like 2+ hours had passed.

In the end, they still left the stage after our screams of “DON’T GO” relented into reluctant “Goodbye”s.

Sakina had hitouch after the show (can you IMAGINE) so we waited for her outside while going through what had actually just happened for the past three hours. Aizzah’d forgotten she had heatstroke earlier that day and Amal and I, desperate for water, just took two unopened water bottles from the massive heap of confiscated bottles at the entrance of the stadium. After Sakina appeared (and was bombarded with questions of how the hitouch went), we left to find a taxi to get back to Asoke. It was raining outside but I honestly couldn’t be bothered with an umbrella or anything because now that the show had ended, I could feel the grotesqueness of my whole being from sweating the whole day in its entirety. We had 7-Eleven ramen that night and I pretty much also passed out that night too, still somewhat hung up in remnants of disbelief of what I’d just experienced.

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

7th August, Sunday

I’d thought I’d wake up that morning feeling awfully drained but I surprised myself by waking up naturally at 9AM feeling not completely dead. Getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom didn’t make my limbs feel like falling off like I thought it would. So that was a good start to the day.

Aizzah and Amal decided to stay in so I followed Sakina shopping at Siam Paragon and Central World Festival where I spent half the time thinking about last night and the other half catching Pokemon.


At lunchtime, Aizzah and Amal called to tell us they were having lunch at a Korean restaurant near Asoke so Sakina and I went to meet them. It was the first time in two days that I had a proper meal and it felt so satisfying.

Jal meokkesseumnida

We had to leave the airbnb by 3PM and Sakina, Aizzah and Amal were flying back home that day so after checking out, we each said our goodbyes before they left for the airport in a taxi. I’d only seen Sakina for about two days yet it felt like a really long time and saying bye carried more reluctance than I’d thought. Saying goodbye meant that this Bangkok trip was almost coming to an end, and I didn’t know when I would be seeing her again.

After their taxi drove off, I started making my way to the Sukhumvit MRT station where I was going to take the BTS (Bangkok Mass Transit System, not Bangtan Sonyeondan sadly) to Siam Paragon to meet up with Sin Ming and Zhi Ting, luggage in tow.

In retrospect, if I’d been more wary of the dark clouds in the sky and the low rumbling among them, I probably would’ve taken active action by walking faster but as it was, I was still thinking about, well, everything that had happened in Bangkok so far, like meeting Sakina and watching Bangtan etc that I was completely caught offguard when it began to rain. Like actual pouring rain. Rain bullets you couldn’t dodge no matter how you ran. That was exactly what I did though, pulling my luggage along with me at that, and I thought to just run the entire way to the station since I was already semi-soaked but I couldn’t. I gave up and halted in my footsteps right in front of a Thai food stall where several other tourists were also taking shelter. A Thai man standing next to me was putting on his raincoat before getting on his motorbike and noticing my state of distress, he asked me something in Thai which I took to assume was a question about where I was headed to so I told him Sukhumvit station. I then asked (or rather, gestured) if it was still far and he nodded and I just weak laughed, jokingly saying (gesturing) that I could only run to the station once the rain subsided a little (but was I really joking). Before leaving though, he gave me a plastic bag and pointed at my phone that I was clutching in my left hand, indicating that I could use it to protect it from the rain and I thanked him, grateful for his small but incredibly kind gesture.

The rain somehow got heavier and I moved inside the building, wondering how long I had to wait for the rain to stop or at least subside so I could make a reasonable run for it. The other tourists had hailed a cab and left, so it was just me, my damp luggage and my dripping hair waiting pathetically in front of someone’s shop. At the back of my mind I told myself I could always call an Uber but I was already so near to the station and taking an Uber in a guaranteed rain-induced traffic jam didn’t sound appealing at all. It was just a matter of time before the shopkeeper approached me and spoke to me in Thai. Again, I assumed she was asking where I wanted to go to and I gave the same reply, after which she made an umbrella gesture with her hands and I shook my head saying no, I didn’t have an umbrella with me. It turned out that she wasn’t asking me whether I had an umbrella or not because moments later, a teenage guy (whom I assumed to be her son) emerged from the back with one of those giant ass umbrellas you put over tables in hawker stalls when it was raining, and then it clicked. He was going to walk me to the station with the giant ass umbrella so I didn’t get wet in the rain. I was SO OVERWHELMED by this sudden act of extreme kindness from a literal stranger that my first instinct was to reject the offer because it would be such a hassle for him, but I wasn’t exactly in a position to do that and I did indeed wanted to get to the station as soon as possible.

It was a five-minute walk to the station and the entire time I was just in awe at how recent events had unfolded and when we reached the station, I couldn’t stop thanking him profusely, heart bursting with gratitude because they didn’t have to do that, didn’t have to offer help to a stranger like me who doesn’t even speak their language. Same goes for the Uber driver two nights ago who made sure I got to my airbnb safely. These people have gotten me out of sticky situations and they didn’t even know me, and for that I was just so stunned and immensely grateful that if it weren’t for them, I probably wouldn’t have been able to get to where I needed to be in a city so big and foreign.

I got to Siam Paragon, still intact and drier than before, and continued to hunt for Pokemon on the way to where Sin Ming and Zhi Ting were. It was still such an amusing and amazing experience for me, seeing clusters of people in the mall with their phones out, grouping around Pokestops. Since that morning, I’d developed a habit of peeking at the screens of passing people who I suspected were playing Pokemon Go and 1) I quite literally suspected everyone who had their phones out 2) I was right every single time. It was so bizarre, somewhat like a running inside joke that didn’t need to be spoken out loud. I still feel that way whenever I’m out Pokehunting in Alor Setar.

I met up with Sin Ming and Zhi Ting and we took the MRT to Dindaeng, where their airbnb was. After dropping off my luggage, we headed for a nearby food market where, yet again, I kept a conscious lookout for Pokemon Go players and bought pad thai for dinner. It started raining again so we left before it could get too heavy, and once we reached the airbnb, we had our pad thai dinner on the bed while watching Sin Ming’s video recordings of last night’s concert (because she was in the standing pit) and reliving everything once again to our hearts’ content.

It was already past midnight by the time we watched almost an hour’s worth of footage and felt nostalgic for something that had only happened the night before. Our flight was 10AM the next morning so I tried to calm my suddenly hyped brain to fall asleep and soon enough, physical exhaustion took over and I did doze off.

8th August, Monday

We woke up at 4AM and got an Uber to Don Mueang at 5.30AM. I was half-asleep during the entire car ride, but I managed to take one last snap of the Bangkok sunrise before I left this city.

During both BKK-KUL and KUL-PEN flights I had the concert setlist on repeat while reading the HYYH programme book. By the time I reached Penang, it was already 5PM and I used airport wifi to call an Uber to Bellyn’s house.

I was surprised when the Uber that arrived was a small Viva driven by a Chinese uncle, who had his grandson in the passenger seat navigating on Google maps while playing Pokemon Go simultaneously. All along whenever I used Uber in Manchester (and even in Bangkok), it always seemed like a premium car service but this was only my second time using the app in Malaysia. Thus this prompted me to ask the uncle whether this car was his and he said yes, he was a part-time Uber driver looking for a side income now that he was in his seventies. He was really nice, and we talked during the entire hour-long journey during which I found out he was born in Alor Setar as well. I was so physically worn out from travelling the whole day and functioning on only four hours of sleep but maybe because I was back in a familiar town, or because being able to strike up a conversation with a kind stranger was really nice, but I allowed myself to relax instead of being on edge even though I was alone. And then when I reached Bellyn’s house I thanked him, said goodbye and wished him a good life.

I was pretty much already at home at Bellyn’s house, and I told her, amidst her one-man audience cello revival show, that I absolutely enjoyed doing nothing after the past few days that had felt like a few million years. At night, we went to Gurney Paragon for a while and those few hours since touching down at Penang have been the most relaxed and chill moments that I’d craved for after such a tiring and fulfilling trip.

9th August, Tuesday

That morning, we revisited Kong Thai Lai, a tiny quaint coffee shop in Georgetown that Bellyn had brought me to ever since our second semester at Sunway. Breakfast kaya toast and soft-boiled egg will always have a special fond place in my heart.

I was supposed to take a 1.30PM bus from Sungai Nibong back to Alor Setar but after getting into the car, Bellyn suddenly said, “I half feel like driving you back to Alor Setar right now” and that was exactly what we did. We went to pick Mei Huey up and then commenced the impromptu journey back home.

The journey took an hour and when we reached Alor Setar, we went to Caffe Diem and had meatballs with a strange mash-potato gravy thing and then Bellyn wanted to find cello strings so I drove us to Sze Chan who didn’t have them and then Rhythm who also didn’t have them but instead directed us to Symphony at some hidden, obscure taman at Telok Wanjah. We were quite literally going round in circles but we found it in the end and after Bellyn triumphantly acquired said strings, we headed home.

Bellyn and Mei Huey were introduced to our newly adopted dog, Ah Boy (who took an immense liking to Mei Huey) and then I was influenced to pull out my violin which I hadn’t touched since leaving Sunway (a Schrodinger’s violin, like Harris said, because I was afraid to open the case to see if my strings and bow were still intact) (they were) and I surprised myself by still being able to read musical notes, to be honest.

And then at around 6.30PM, Bellyn and Mei Huey left, our last words to each other bidding of farewells shouted through rolled-down car windows at the road junction leading to the highway.

A Night Full of Dreams

The Coldplay hype had been going strong since last year when we bought our tickets to watch them perform live on the 4th of June at Etihad Stadium and now, it was finally upon us. Eight months later, we were finally watching Coldplay live for the first (and most probably last) time on their A Head Full of Dreams tour.

On Saturday, Rumin, Brian and I took an Uber to Etihad Stadium at around 5:30PM (we had reserved seating tickets so we didn’t have to queue), joined by Jovaynne who I later on found out was also going to the show, albeit seated at a different section. Etihad was already full of people and incredibly traffic jammed by the time we reached the stadium. We still had time before the first opening act started at 7PM so we attempted to find Yee Lin, Jia Yang and CC who were volunteering at the food stalls that night but unbeknownst to us, they were actually at a different entrance (out of approximately 40 entrances) from ours.

Our seats were literally second highest from the top on the topmost section, which also translates to 1) climbing an incredibly long flight of stairs that gave me mild vertigo and 2) the singers and band on stage appearing tinily ant-sized to us. But despite that, it was Coldplay, and the mere sight of the massive crowd and stage was enough to make me feel super excited in anticipation of what the night would entail. Ash and Ee Min were in the unreserved standing section and even managed to spot us (equally ant-sized) at our elevated position.

The first two hours were occupied with Alessia Cara and Lianne La Havas’ performances as opening acts. I’d heard of them before but not really their songs but they delivered, even though most of the crowd was just itching for Coldplay’s set to start already.

These Xylobands literally single-handedly brought Coldplay’s performance value many notches above everyone else’s. Your faves could never

And then at 9PM, the background music died down and peals of excited screaming echoed throughout the whole stadium, mine included. It was actually beginning, one of the (if not the) best concerts I’d been to, even if I didn’t know it yet.

Bright rainbow-coloured laser lights lit up the stage while a rotating kaleidoscopic sphere appeared on the LED screen behind the band as Chris Martin started to run down the extended stage pathway, commencing the night’s show with A Head Full of Dreams.

The Xylobands were all centrally synchronised and lit up in different colours according to different songs, and at different frequencies and rhythms

The rainbow smoke was soooooo cooooool

When they played Yellow, the stadium lit up in a sea of, you guessed it, yellow

During Adventure of A Lifetime, the Xylobands lit up in the pattern of a heartbeat at the lyrics “I feel my heart beating” and it really just sends shivers down your spine

This was during Fix You, particularly at the part where the lyrics went “lights will guide you home”. Can you imagine being surrounded by this and witnessing it with your own two eyes. It felt as breath-taking as it looked

The small stage at the very back of the standing section where they performed song requests and acoustic songs

A Religious Experience™

It was amazing. Beyond amazing. The visual effects were absolutely stunning and the best I’ve ever seen, as expected and more of a Coldplay concert. The atmosphere was brilliant, everyone singing at the top of their lungs regardless of tone and pitch, letting loose any and all wild contagious dance moves. The songs and Chris’ showmanship made it impossible for us to stay in our seats. At one point during Adventure of A Lifetime, he got everyone to quiet down during the bridge and once the chorus hit, everyone leapt up and so did I, not caring that I was at a very high place and that I probably looked incredibly silly. That feeling you get at gigs when everyone around you is as indulged in the music and the ambience as you are was amplified so much more at a stadium of capacity 60,000. It was phenomenal.

Two hours later, at 11PM, they ended the night with Up & Up before the credits (literally) started rolling and the stadium lights came on and we had to reluctantly leave, the magic of the night having come to a halt but still lingering upon us, evinced in our blushed cheeks, hoarse throats, sore limbs and most importantly, wide grins.

As far as concerts go (and I don’t proclaim to be a gig veteran but I’ve been to a fair few so I’m basing any personal opinions on my scarce experiences), I can, without a doubt or hesitation, conclude that Coldplay’s 2016 A Head Full of Dreams show at Etihad Stadium, Manchester was hands down the most astounding and spectacular concert I’d been to. And honestly, I don’t see how anyone could disagree with me.

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

A Moment of

Right after my Obligations I paper last Friday, I went to the Dot to Dot festival scattered around Northern Quarter. But because I got restless while waiting for an 8PM set that hadn’t even started by 8.45PM, Ee Min and I went to get sushi and bubble tea before making it back just in time to squeeze all the way to the very front for The Temper Trap’s set.

Despite only attending their show that night, it was well worth it.


Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

// M A N C H E S T E R T O N I G H T // L O V E , T H E 1 9 7 5

The 1975 Day was a Sunday, and that Sunday, despite it being two days away from my first essay deadline, I allowed myself to not think about essays for the entire day. So when Carmen suggested we go shopping before going to the show, I went all out and suggested we had sushi for lunch, and that was what we did. Any day with sushi is always a good day. Then we had bubble tea at Chinatown before shopping at Primark, seeking solace in retail therapy. We went back to Weston to change into concert wear after that – and emerged wearing unplanned matching outfits of black tops with denim skirts. I learned my lesson from Halsey the previous time and sacrificed the wellbeing of my toes and my shoes to wear platforms to compensate for my height. And then it was off to O2 Apollo we went, TO WATCH THE 1975 LIVE IN MANCHESTER

We joined the queue at 5.30PM, so that wasn’t very early but the line wasn’t very long either. The spring sunset was very pretty and it was the subject of our attention for a good few minutes due to the lack of stimuli present while waiting in the queue. At 7PM, the queue started moving and an objective observation that I can make, all the way into the crowd in the venue, is that the crowd of concertgoers was definitely calmer and less terrifying and rowdy than the one at Halsey. O2 Apollo was so much bigger than Manchester Academy as well, that I didn’t feel suffocated or pushed from all sides by the crowd, making the show already much more pleasant before it had even begun.

Yours truly and Carmen

The opening act was called The Japanese House, which, okay. They were not bad and it was fronted by a female vocalist so that was even more appealing. Later on, we found out that they would also be attending Dot To Dot Festival.

At half past eight, The Japanese House left the stage, and in place were bright white lights shining from the stage and onto the crowd while a subtle but consistent hum of suspense filled the room, the kind which you can easily dismiss as background noise or a stray note from an instrument if you don’t pay too much attention to it. But it gradually got louder and more high-pitched, like a revved up engine, deliberately instilling suspense even where there was none in the first place. And then at 9PM on the dot, the stage went dark and the hum went silent and the crowd went wild, before we were greeted by a saxophone intro and a bright pink-lit stage to Love Me.

Every single stage set-up for each song was so aesthetically pleasing they looked like they were taken straight out of a magazine (see what I did).

The climax of my night was possibly fallingforyou, and I told myself I wouldn’t cry but I did anyway because the live performance of that song hit me in all the right places and it was just very beautiful and very incredible to contrast listening to their songs in my room two, three years ago in college and now, standing in front of the actual real band watching and listening to them perform live. I love music shows so much.


  • Love Me
  • UGH!
  • Heart Out
  • So Far (It’s Alright)
  • A Change of Heart
  • She’s American
  • Anobrain
  • Menswear
  • The Ballad of Me and My Brain
  • Me
  • fallingforyou
  • Somebody Else
  • Robbers
  • You
  • Loving Someone
  • Paris
  • Girls


  • If I Believe You
  • Chocolate
  • The Sound
  • Sex

The final encore was everything everyone wanted, literally, as people started chanting, “We want Sex!” (not something to be heard out of context). And so, with a “Thank you, Manchester!” from Matty followed by Sex (the song), the night came to an end and both Carmen and I reluctantly left, exclaiming non-stop about how good of a show it was. And then we had dim sum for supper to round up the pretty much perfect day.


Carmen also made a vlog about our day!

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:


Halsey Badlands Tour: Live in Manchester

One of the main reasons why I chose to come to Manchester to attend university was because of Manchester’s comprehensive and up-to-date music scene, so naturally, one of the first things that I did when I came here was to search for nearby concerts and gigs. And one of them was Halsey at Manchester Academy on the 22nd of February.

Unfortunately, I forgot about the day tickets went on sale and they sold out really quickly in a matter of minutes. A few weeks later though, I found someone selling a ticket for the show on Twickets and I’d never pressed the “Buy” button as quickly before, leaving any second thinking or doubts for later (there were none).

This was my first gig in the UK so I was predictably pretty anxious the few days leading up to Monday night: what kind of clothes should I wear? If I wear winter clothes it’s going to be really hot inside but if I wear otherwise it’s going to be really cold when I queue up outside. And what do I do with my coat? Do I hold it? (I later on found out about the existence of cloakrooms) What time should I queue? It was my first time going to a show alone so how are things gonna go? Can I cope with the crowd alone? Do I walk back to my halls or take the bus after the show? It was like a press conference in my head and none of which I knew the answers to.

The question about queuing was answered for me preemptively by my very own criminal law lecturer because I had lectures on Monday till 5PM anyway so that was the earliest I could queue. When classes ended though, the line was already stretching all the way from Manchester Academy to AGLC so what the heck, I might as well eat something first if the line’s already this long so I had Subway with Ee Min, Yee Lin and Kah Yee before walking allllllll the way to the end of the line (which had already reached the entrance of the main library holy heck), heaving sighs simultaneously. Ee Min accompanied me until the line started to move into the Academy, so that made the cold 5°C wait outside a lot more bearable.

My fingers and toes were already partially frozen by the time I finally entered the Academy – and into this room with a stage placed right in front in the centre. I wouldn’t say the venue was huge because it wasn’t, just slightly bigger than my uni lecture theatre but despite that, after I joined the crowd, the people pushing and jostling against me as well as the collective excited chatters surrounding me didn’t make me feel like I was in a mere crowd of 2,500 but rather five times that number.

The first two hours of the show from 7.30 to 9.30 were opening acts by Flor and BØRNS, who were pretty good but by 9PM, the crowd was starting to get restless and began chanting Halsey’s name several times. At 9.30 on the dot, the stage lights went dark and everybody screamed. I couldn’t help it – I joined in the shrieking too. The background screens started flashing rapidly, followed by the entrance of the band members. The string-plucking intro sequence of Gasoline began to play and the ever beautiful Halsey emerged from the spotlight to grace us with her rich, heavenly voice.

Because I queued at 6, I was actually quite far back when I got into the Academy but during the opening acts, there were people who didn’t stop pushing against me from the back the entire time so I got really, really annoyed at that because I was already starting to feel light-headed and anxious from the extreme proximity from all directions and I didn’t need to be pinned between two bodies when I was struggling to inhale some fresh air. They were three girls who were really, really good at squeezing to the front and in the end I decided if I couldn’t beat them, I might as well join them so I followed behind them until I was a good meter from the barrier right in the middle. Possibly the most ideal position at a gig – only if I was a few inches taller. And thus, because of my cursed height (or lack thereof), me standing in a relatively good spot didn’t make much of a difference when there was literally a wall of three tall people directly in front of me that I had to stand on tiptoe and strain my neck upwards the entire time to catch sporadic glimpses of Halsey on stage.


  • Gasoline
  • Hold Me Down
  • Castle
  • Haunting
  • Control
  • Roman Holiday
  • Ghost
  • Is There Somewhere
  • Drive
  • Hurricane
  • New Americana
  • Colors pt. II
  • Colors

When the stage lights went dim again, I was furiously hoping the last encore would be Young God because it was one of my favourites from Badlands and you know what, Halsey did not disappoint at all.

(These photos are actually from Colors but they are so beautiful and make for a good ending to this post.)

And then came the dread of Halsey leaving the stage, the venue lights coming back on and the crowd dispersing. I could finally breathe again but I also definitely wished it was possible for there to be multiple encores per show. Still, I untied my jacket from my waist to put it on and step out into the (for once) inviting cold wintry air of the night, all the while marvelling at how beautiful Halsey was in person, how amazing she sounded live and how much of a great time I had at my first ever gig in the UK.

Some of my favourite songs that I managed to record (among the playlist here):

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

OneRepublic Native Tour Live in Malaysia 2013

One of the events I’ve been looking forward to for weeks is OneRepublic’s first ever Malaysian showcase at Sunway Lagoon’s Surf Beach. Upon finding out that they were including KL as a part of their Native Tour, I asked Soo May if I could be her media representative for KL Lifestyle at the gig; and she managed to get me two media passes for it. So naturally I roped in my housemate, Yi Jing to join me for the concert.

On the day itself, my exuberance fell greatly when I found out halfway through classes that it was raining very, very heavily. But thankfully, it stopped like an hour or two before the concert, which was super convenient.

So after classes ended, at around 5PM, we started heading to Sunway Pyramid, where we registered at the media booth. How disappointed I was when the man behind the booth said we could only go in at around 7.30-8PM so the next few hours were spent rather painfully, wandering around Pyramid aimlessly because all I wanted right then was to just go inside already. Even Irfan, my classmate and publicly-proclaimed OneRepublic buddy, who got VIP passes got to go in to queue up at the mosh pit already, so the wait was a little bit of a disappointment but then all of that was forgotten when we were finally let inside Surf Beach at around 8PM.

It was a mere crowd of approximately 5,000 people, so naturally it wasn’t exactly full. Despite being absolutely starved (I started getting hungry only as we entered Surf Beach…how convenient), both of us were determined to squeeze to the front (we had VIP privilege too as media people hah) and for once, I was glad for my petite size. The gladness, however, diminished when I realise that we were literally surrounded by tall people. As in, we had to actually tiptoe 80% of the entire concert to get a good view of the stage (but then again we were only about two metres away from the stage which was actually not bad). In order to get nearer to the stage, we had to take off our shoes because there was a huge puddle that most people avoided even though the puddle was, well, only two metres from the stage, but it was a sacrifice we were willing to make; and it was well worth it.

The concert started with full suspense as a white cloth was suspended over the stage, which was pulled off only after 30 minutes of endless shouts of frustration from the audience. And then the five members of the band were revealed and holy friiiiiccckkkkk were they amazing. It had been two years since I last went to a concert (Elton John) and three years since I went to one where people didn’t sit down during the entire show (Paramore). The adrenaline rush that surged through my system then was sudden but pleasant, and being in the general ambience where you were surrounded by people who were singing along together word by word was simply indescribable. At that moment, we were all as one as we danced and jumped and waved our hands about (not too wildly, in case you hit someone near you) and felt sandy water splash around our ankles and calves. But all that didn’t matter because at the moment, it was just us, the stage, and the music.

(Perks of being a media journalist: you get HQ photos for free)

The 5,000-ish crowd (Photography credit: TianChad)
The 5,000-ish crowd (Photography credit: TianChad)

Photography credit: TianChad
Photography credit: TianChad

Photography credit: TianChad
Photography credit: TianChad

Photography credit: TianChad
Photography credit: TianChad

And then super talented lead singer Ryan Tedder got on his piano and started belting out ballads in his strong voice of his (that was a billion times better live than in their records I kid you not) . Perhaps my favourite moment ever of the entire showcase was when Ryan made a medley out of Justin Timberlake’s Cry Me A River, Rihanna’s We Found Love and most amazingly, Coldplay’s Yellow. If I was sitting on a chair, I would’ve fallen off that chair. If I was hanging onto a rope, I would’ve let go of that rope.

And when they covered Kanye West’s Gold Digger I wanted to climb on stage and run around proclaiming my love and gratitude for the whole band.

Photography credit: TianChad
Photography credit: TianChad

Photography credit: TianChad
At this point, Ryan descended the stage and DID YOU KNOW IRFAN GOT TO TOUCH RYAN WITH HIS OWN BARE HANDS (Photography credit: TianChad)

One Republic Native Live Tour in Malaysia-8860

Photography credit: TianChad
Photography credit: TianChad

It also didn’t hurt that there was this super enthusiastic guy next to me who very obviously is an avid OneRepublic fan (judging by the way he knew every single word to every single song) and I daresay his excitement was fairly contagious. (Creepy note: he smelled pretty good as well, which is something you don’t meet very often at concerts.)


  • Don’t Look Down
  • Light It Up
  • Secrets
  • All The Right Moves
  • What You Wanted
  • Stop and Stare
  • Counting Stars
  • Spanish Guitar Medley
  • Apologize (with “Cry Me a River” snippet + medley)
  • Burning Bridges
  • Preacher
  • Gold Digger (Kanye West cover)
  • Can’t Stop
  • Marchin’ On
  • I Lived
  • Good Life


  • Feel Again
  • If I Lose Myself

One Republic Native Live Tour in Malaysia-9067

I was FINALLY close enough to the stage to get bombarded with the final confetti (Photography credit: TianChad)
I was FINALLY close enough to the stage to get bombarded with the final confetti (Photography credit: TianChad)

After the encore (which I, admittedly, did not realise was the encore), everyone refused to budge despite the fact that the band had already said, “Goodbye KL, thank you for coming!”. There was a certain…incompleteness to the whole show; like what someone I overheard said, they hadn’t even introduced themselves yet. Like they had left too early. 20 minutes after they left the stage, we still stayed put, clinging onto the slim sliver of hope that all five of them would leap out and burst into one final song before actually, finally leaving. But nope. All we were greeted with was random crew members packing up the equipments, much to our dismay.

After the show, I texted Kak Dena (whom I found out was at the gig as well) and we met up to catch up briefly during the entire journey out of Surf Beach. That was one of the more unprecedented but pleasant surprises of the night.

Yi Jing and yours truly with the stage after the showcase

Yours truly with the absolutely adorable Kak Dena!



Despite it already being 11.30PM by the time we reached the apartment, the night didn’t just end there. We ordered 24 hours mamak for dinner, a dinner that we only finished at 2AM. So that was part of my eventful life as a college student.

There is a particularly different kind of joy that comes with attending music events, and safe to say, it is one of the most wonderful feelings in the whole world.

Michelle’s People I’ve Watched Live List, updated:

Paramore Live in Kuala Lumpur 2010

Note: I am sorry if the pictures are of terrible quality because I only had my phone with me at the time.

19th October 2010 has been one of my most anticipated dates this year, ever since Daphne told me Paramore is officially coming to Malaysia to perform for the first time. I bought the tickets off Ticketpro for RM242 and got Joshua to go with me.

Joshua and I reached the Bukit Jalil Stadium at 3pm, and waited at the very front of the gates until 6.30pm when the guards finally let us in. I know the tickets said “Doors open @ 7.00pm” but people were starting to chant “LET US IN!” and someone slipped in or something and even the guards couldn’t control everyone by then so everyone just started rushing in.

The crowd at 4/5pm.

The crowd at 5/6pm.

The Gates of Run-Like-Hell-To-Get-The-Best-Seats

So after getting through the gates, it was a race of getting your ticket scanned, torn, having ladies giving out flyers, and reaching the entrance to the seats where you had to get your ticket and hand stamped. We were pretty much the first to reach the seats as we were first in the line at the gates after all. And then it’s another hour or so of waiting.

Those lucky Rock Zone people getting in early + getting their autographs and all. 😦

Courtesy of Huixian.

Then finally the lights went off and everyone gasped and got to their feet but it was the opening act, a local band called Y2K which, to be fairly honest, sucked. The female lead singer was actually trying to imitate Hayley by jumping around but I’m sorry no one beats Hayley Williams that easily. No one.

Y2K playing and no one is paying attention. Wonder why.

They performed about 5 songs and said, “I’m so sorry because I know you guys want to watch Paramore and we’re in the way” and I was like, “Yeah you are”, so they played their final song (which was not good actually) and they left the stage and we had to wait for another half hour, I think.

But the wait was worthwhile, because their entrance was spectacular. I started screaming like there was no tomorrow and it was definitely amazing no words could ever describe my adrenaline high.

Courtesy of Huixian

Then the curtain dropped, and they started blasting Ignorance.

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian (Acoustic- Hayley + Josh)

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian (Acoustic- Hayley + Josh + Taylor)

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian (Skirt=<3)

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian (Someone threw her a plushie)

Courtesy of Huixian (Someone threw her a shirt too)

I think I screamed and cried and sang at the same time. It wasn’t just the song, I’ve heard it millions of times, although it was an upbeat number, it was the atmosphere, the crowd, the simple fact of looking –looking with my own naked eyes!– at Paramore, at Hayley Williams, Josh Farro, Zac Farro, Jeremy Davis and Taylor York with their guitars, drum and Hayley’s trademark red mic that set me off. Paramore! Right in front of my eyes! After years and years of just looking at photographs and salivating/drooling over them and how amazing they are. There was no need to think at all when I started singing. Everything came on its own, the tears, the lyrics, the screams. It was amazing. An entirely out-of-world experience.

The setlist for the show is as goes:

  • Ignorance
  • Feeling Sorry
  • That’s What You Get
  • For A Pessimist, I’m Pretty Optimistic
  • Emergency
  • Playing God
  • Careful
  • Decode
  • Let This Go (Acoustic)
  • When It Rains (Acoustic)
  • Where The Lines Overlap (Acoustic)
  • Misguided Ghosts (Acoustic)
  • Crushcrushcrush
  • Pressure
  • Looking Up
  • The Only Exception


  • Brick By Boring Brick
  • Misery Business

When Hayley and Josh headed for a corner of the stage to sing Let This Go, I actually thought they would sing My Heart, you have no idea how much I want to hear Josh screaming. And at some point when Hayley was singing Misguided Ghosts, the mic broke. The mic broke. Malaysia, you and your shitty sound system! Hayley actually curtsied and ran to the back of the stage, leaving Josh and Taylor just sitting there and I was horrified if she was mad at the sound system or something and we started chanting “Paramore! Paramore!” and I was actually at the verge of tears. Elya said the mic even broke when Josh was singing When It Rains/Where The Lines Overlap. Are you actually kidding me? But eventually Hayley came back out front and started singing Crushcrushcrush and I was so glad and relieved I just couldn’t stop screaming.

At some point during Pressure, Hayley started introducing everyone in the band and oh my God I couldn’t stop screaming when Hayley called John the vocalist slash keyboardist slash man on the computer, Jeremy the bass player, Zac the youngest drummer, Taylor the Justin Timberlake of Paramore, Josh the lead guitarist, and finally Josh took the mic and said, “There’s only one member left of Paramore to introduce…the lead vocalist of Paramore, Hayley Williams!” And I thought I couldn’t scream anymore but apparently I could so I screamed some more. And when Jeremy flipped over Josh with his guitar, I swear I just screamed till I died. What do you do at a concert if you’re not screaming? Because everytime they started playing a new song I was basically screaming out the song, dancing, jumping, waving my hands, clapping, and headbanging. Forgetting everything else except the music, myself and the band on stage in that hour and a half was the best moment ever. Indulging. Forgetting the woes and troubles and just enjoying yourself to your very last cell. Pumped. Wanting for more. The feeling is just indescribable. For people, it might just seem like “another concert to go to on a fairly boring day” but to me, it actually means a lot. The world. It’s Paramore. They band I’ve been listening to for two years over and over again. It was the feeling of being in their presence. To jump and dance wildly along with them, forgetting every single thing, how silly you might actually look like or how terrible your singing might be, going into that zone where there is just you, the music and the band. It’s like the spotlight on your mundane life, a significant memory you would remember and cherish forever, the memory of being to your first concert to watch your favourite band, because it was the only night you truly felt happy and free, to just forget the world and live in your own for a while. It was amazing. I just can’t describe the immensity of ecstasy and euphoria through words.

When Hayley said the show was about to end, I wanted more. I didn’t want this moment to end, but end it did, with a very energetic Misery Business that made the crowd go crazy. Oh, and there was this guy who got called by Hayley to sing Misery Business together with her and if looks were daggers he would have been dead. And Hayley threw Zac’s drumsticks and Josh’s/Jeremy’s guitar pick and being the one who was about a metre away from the stage I wanted to tear my hair out in frustration. And then there was confetti. And then the lights went on, Paramore left the stage and the show ended.

Before you facepalm at my photos, here are the ones I stole from Elya’s Tumblr:

When Josh introduced Hayley. <3"

Hayley and Paramore's box set.

These were shots taken by Huixian’s friend, Keana, who was in the mosh pit and therefore got clear headshots and stuff.

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Courtesy of Keana

Confetti everywhere

Courtesy of Huixian

Courtesy of Huixian (Hayley jumped onto Josh to piggyback her aww adorbz)

DIY tattoo that I am never washing off.

The state I was in after the show. Sweaty, panting and exhausted, but ecstatic all the same.

Courtesy of Huixian

After the show, I met up with Sasha and we both agreed the concert was so sick. No chance to meet up with Elya but there’ll always be a next time. Haziqah even said she saw me which was unexpected but put a smile on my face all the same.

Despite lining up for hours, the show was totally worth it. I probably should mention I came home with a hungover, feeling sick and dizzy, but it was worth it. No photos, autographs or merch but they’ll be back, I’m absolutely sure, and if they’re not, I’m flying over to meet them pronto. Despite the sore neck, back, arms, legs and throat, it was worth it.


“Once you’re in the Paramore family, we’re never letting you out. You’re in for life!”

-Hayley Williams